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Lawyer Jokes
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Lawyer Jokes or lawyer humor or Court Room Jokes is a kind of professional jokes focused on Lawyers and Judiciary. Lawyer Jokes might
present lawyers as lacking in honesty, ethics or kindness. This is because most of the people believe that lawyers always keep their benefit in their mind and they can do any thing for this reason. This site also includes comments on Judiciary and Legal system within the lawyer jokes. We have a good collection of Funny Jokes on Lawyers. These jokes are original and best in its category. Hope you will enjoy these jokes. You can mail these lawyer jokes to your friends or someone you want. If you have some Lawyer Jokes please send your joke to us so that we will display your lawyer jokes on our website.
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Latest Lawyer Jokes
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Lawyers Instead of White Rats
National Institute of Health is starting to use lawyers instead of white rats in experiments for three reasons:
1. There are so many of them.
2. You don't get nearly as attached.
3. There are somethings that rats wont do.
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Words in Court
ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
ATTORNEY: I see, but could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?
WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law.
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Attorney vs Witness
ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated?
WITNESS: By death.
ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated?
WITNESS: Take a guess.
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Three Children
ATTORNEY: She had three children, right?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: How many were boys?
WITNESS: None.
ATTORNEY: Were there any girls?
WITNESS: Your Honour, Can I get a new attorney?
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An Example
ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
WITNESS: I forget.
ATTORNEY: You forget? Can you give us an example of something you forgot?
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