Hindi Jokes

Ek bhikhari bheekh mangne ke liye masjid ke bahar baitha tha. Sab namaazi aankh bacha kar chale gaye aur usko kuchh na mila..

Wo phir church gaya..
Phir mandir aur phir gurudware..
Lekin usko kisi ne kuchh na diya..

Aakhir me ek beer bar ke baahar aakar baith gaya..
Jo bhi sharabi baahar nikalta woh uske katore mein kuchh daal deta
Uska katora paison se bhar gaya...

Faqeer bola :- "Waah re Prabhu" Rehte kahan ho aur address kahan ka dete ho..

Ek murgi ne ek Baaj se shadi kar li
.
.
.
.
To ek Murga bola : Hum mar gaye the kya??
.
.
.
.
.
.
Murgi Boli : Mai to tumse hi shadi karna chahti thi, lekin Mom-Dad chahte the ki mera pati Air-Force me ho

Janta maaf nahi karegi collection :---

1. Whatsapp par 2 km lambe message bhejne waalon
# Janta maaf nahi karegi

2. John Abraham ko comedy film me cast karne waalon
# Janta maaf nahi karegi

3. Har hafte Adobe update nikaalne wale logon
# Janta maaf nahi karegi

4. Good morning ko Guuddd Morningggg..!!! Likhne waalon
# Janta maaf nahi karegi

5. Chilar ki jagah, Eclairs dene waalon
# Janta maaf nahi karegi

6. Har movie se pehle gutka mukesh ki ad dikhane waalo,
# Janta maaf nahi karegi

7. Ladkon ki reply par hmmm.. likhne wali ladkiyon,
# Janta maaf nahi karegi

8. "I love you but as a friend" kehne wali ladkiyon
# Janta maaf nahi karegi

9. Har hafte set max par Sooryavansham dikhane waalon
# Janta maaf nahi karegi

10. Sunny Leone ko sari pehnaane waalon
# Janta maaf nahi karegi

11. Android per BBM use karne waalon
# Janta maaf nahi karegi

12. 21 ball me 11 run bana ke world cup harvane waalon
# Janta maaf nahi karegi

"Cheeta Cigarette Ka Kash Lagane Hi Wala Tha Ki

Achanak Chuha Wahan Aaya
Aur Bola, Bhai Chhod Do Nasha,

Aao Mere Saath,
Dekho Jungle Kitna Khubsurat Hai.
Cheetah Chuhe Ke Saath Chal Diya.

Aage Hathi Cocaine Le Raha Tha,
Chuha Fir Bola,
Bhai Chhod Do Nasha,

Aao Mere Saath,
Dekho Jungle Kitna Khubsurat Hai.
Hathi Bhi Saath Chal Diya.

Aage Sher Whisky Pene Ki Tayari Kar Raha Tha,
Chuhe Ne Usse Bhi Woi Kaha.

Sher Ne Glass Side Par Rakha Aur Chuhe Ko 5-6 Thappad Mare.

Hathi Bola: Kyun Maar Rahe Ho Is Bechare Ko ?

Sher Bola: Ye Saala Roz gaanja peekar Aise Hi Sabko Puri Raat Jungle Ghumata Hai."

Teacher was teaching Mahabaratha to 6th std students.
"Kans heard devaki's 8th son wud kill him. So he put devaki & vasudev in prison.

1st child was born. Kans killed it by poison.

2nd child Kans killed by sword. 3rd was born n so on...
At this point a boy raised his hand for a doubt.

Teacher : What?

Boy : "If Kans knew that the 8th son wud kill him,
why did he put Devaki & Vasudev in SAME jail?"

Teacher fainted ! Generation gap, but common sense !

Teacher: Tum bade hokar kya karoge?

Student: shaadi..!!!

Teacher: nahi, mera matlab hai kya banoge?

Student: dulha.!!!!!!!

Teacher: oh, i mean bade hokar kya hasil karoge?

Student: dulhan...

Teacher: IDIOT mera matlab bade ho kar mummy papa k liye kya karoge?

Student: Bahu laaunga

Teacher: stupid tumhare papa tumse kya chahte hai?

Student: Pota

Teacher: he bhagwan, tumari zindagi ka kya maksad hai?

Student: Hum do humare do!

Ladka ladki se:

Mere paas mere dost jaisi car nahi hai
Par tumhein palkon pe baitha ke ghumaaunga

Uske jaisa bada ghar nahi hai
Par tumhein dil mein rakhunga

Uske jitne paise nahi hain
Par tumhein majdoori kar ke khilaunga
Aur kya chahiye tumhein????

Ladki:
Bas kar pagle ab rulayega kya...?
Chal apne dost ka number de...

Ek din jeeto bahut saari chocolate kha raha tha. Ek aadmi ne dekha to us-se raha nahi gaya aur woh jeeto ko salaah dene laga.

Aadmi: Beta itni zyada chocolate nahi khaate, sehat ke liye theek nahi hoti.

Jeeto: Ek baat bolun mere dada ji 105 saal ke hain.

Aadmi: Achcha! Kya woh bhi bahut saari chocolate khaate hain.

Jeeto: Nahi.

Aadmi: To phir.

Jeeto: Woh apne kaam se kaam rakhte hain.