Heaven

Sometime into the future Laloo Yadav is dead and has left his wife behind. Rabri was worried whether or not her dead husband made it to heaven, so she decided to try to contact his spirit by having a seance.

Sure enough, after the usual mumbo-jumbo of calling to the spirits, her husband's voice was heard answering, 'Rabriji! This is meeee...'

'Laloo,' she answered. 'I just have to know if you're happy there in the afterlife. What's it like there?'

'Ooooooh, it's much more beautiful here than I ever imagined,' Laloo answered. 'The sky is bluer, the air is cleaner, and the pastures are much more lush and green than I ever expected. And the only thing we do, all day long, are eat and sleep, eat and sleep, over and over.'

'Thank God, you made it to heaven,' his wife cried.

'Heaven?' he answered. 'What heaven? I'm a cow in Bihar!'




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Thought

A pakistani, An Indian, a beautiful girl and an old woman are sitting in a train in Europe.

The train suddenly goes thru a tunnel and ... it gets completely dark. Suddenly there is a kissing sound and then a slap!

The train comes out of the tunnel.

The woman and the Indian are sitting there looking perplexed. The Pakistani is bent over holding his face which is red from an apparent slap.

The old woman is thinking : That pakistani must have tried to kiss that girl and has got slapped.

The Pakistani is thinking : 'Damn it, that Indian must have tried to kiss the girl, she thought it was me and slapped me.'

The girl is thinking : 'That Pakistani must have moved to kiss me, and kissed the Indian instead and got slapped.'

The Indian is thinking, 'If this train goes through another tunnel, I could make another kissing sound and slap that Pakistani again!'

A Pakistani

An American, a Pakistani and an Indian are travelling in plane when there is an emergency and everyone has to jump off.

The American gets hold of a parachute and jumps. Since there is a shortage of parachutes, the Pakistani opens up his turban and jumps holding on to it with both hands as a parachute.

The Indian can't lay hands on anything and he just jumps without anything. After a few seconds of falling at high speeds he passes the Pakistani. The Pakistani gets pretty angry watching him and shouts, 'So you're trying to race me...' and lets go of his turban!

Outside the operation theatre

There are three guys waiting outside the operation theatre. The first person is reading a book called 'Lord Jesus'. A nurse comes out and tells the first person 'Your wife has delivered a baby'.

After sometime the nurse comes back and looks at the second person. The second person is reading a book called 'Lav Kush'. The nurse informs him that his wife has delivered two babies.

After some more time the nurse comes back but before she can say anything the third person runs away from there leaving behind the book he was reading - titled 'Ali Baba Chaalis Chor'.

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