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Ladies Room

Ladies Room

Why men should keep out of ladies rooms

A man traveling by plane and in urgent need to use the mens room is nervously tapping his foot on the floor of the aircraft. Each time he tried the mensroom door, it was "OCCUPIED". The stewardess, aware of his predicament suggested that he go ahead and use the ladies room, but cautioned him against using any of the buttons inside. The buttons were marked "WW, WA, PP and ATR".

Making the mistake that so many men make in disregarding the importance of what a woman says, the man let his curiosity get the best of him and decided to try the buttons anyway.

He carefully pressed the first button marked "WW" and immedately warm water sprayed all over his entire bottom. He thought, "WOW, the women really have it made!". Still curious, he pressed the button marked "WA" and a gentle breeze of warm air quickly dried his hind quarters. He thought that was out of this world! The button marked "PP" yielded a large powder puff which delicately applied a soft talc to his rear.

Well, naturally he couldn't resist the last button marked "ATR". When he woke up in the hospital he paniced and buzzed for the nurse. When she appeared, he cried out, "What happened to me?! The last thing I remember is I was in the ladies room on a business trip!" The nurse replied, "Yes, you were having a great time until you pressed the "ATR" button which stands for Automatic Tampon Remover... Your penis is under your pillow!"




More Sexy Jokes

Love, Lust and Marraige...

Love: When you take a bubble bath together.
Lust: When you take a bath in Jell-o together.
Marriage: When you give the kids a bath.

Love: A romantic candle-light dinner for two.
Lust: "Do I have to buy you dinner first?"
Marriage: 4 McDonald's Happy Meals . . . to go.

Love: Giving your love some candy
Lust: Thinking you are the candy
Marriage: Scraping the kids' candy off of the carpet

Love: Sex every night
Lust: Sex 5 times a night
Marriage: What's sex?

Love: A night out at the symphony
Lust: A night out at the Holiday Inn
Marriage: A night out at Disney World

Love: French perfume
Lust: Brut aftershave
Marriage: "The baby needs changing. . ."

Love: Lending your jacket to your love when he/she is cold
Lust: "I can think of a way to stay warm . . ."
Marriage: Your teenaged daughter has borrowed all of your jackets

Love: Talking and cuddling
Lust: Rolling over and falling asleep
Marriage: Getting up to wash your hands . . .

Love: Long drives through the countryside
Lust: Long parking sessions at Lover's Lookout
Marriage: Long drives with the kids screaming in the backseat

Love: Your eyes meet across a crowded room
Lust: Your tongues meet across a crowded room
Marriage: Your belt won't meet around your waist, and you don't care

Love: You're interested in everything your partner does
Lust: You're only interested in one thing
Marraige: You're not interested in what your partner does and the one thing you're interested in is Stock Market

Precaution

"I must take every precaution not to get pregnant," said Edna to Priscilla.

"But I thought you said your hubby had a vasectomy," Priscilla responded.

"He did. That's why I have to take every precaution."

Introductions

A ship sank in high seas and the following people got stranded on a beautiful deserted island in the middle of nowhere:

A. 2 Italian men and 1 Italian woman

B. 2 French men and 1 French woman

C. 2 German men and 1 German woman

D. 2 Greek men and 1 Greek woman

E. 2 Polish men and 1 Polish woman

F. 2 Mexican men and 1 Mexican woman

G. 2 Irish men and 1 Irish woman

H. 2 American men and 1 American woman

I. 2 Indian men and 1 Indian woman


One month later, on various parts of the island, the following was observed:

A. One Italian man killed the other Italian man for the Italian woman.

B. The two French men and the French woman are living happily together.

C. The two German men have a strict weekly schedule of when they alternate with the German woman.

D. The two Greek men are sleeping together, and the Greek woman is cooking & cleaning for them.

E. The two Polish men took a long look at the endless ocean and a long look at the Polish woman, and they started swimming.

F. The two Mexican men are talking to all the other men on the island trying to sell them the Mexican woman.

G. The two Irish men began by dividing up their part of the island into Northern & Southern parts, and by setting up a distillery. They do not remember the Irish woman because it gets sort of foggy after the first few liters of coconut whiskey; but at least the English are not getting any.

H. The two American men are contemplating suicide. The American woman is bitching about her body being her own, the true nature of feminism, how she can do everything that they can do, about the necessity of fulfillment, the equal division of the household chores, how her last boyfriend respected her opinion and treated her much better, and how her relationship with her mother is improving.



What happened to the Indians ??????


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The 2 Indian men are still waiting for someone to introduce them to the Indian woman!!!

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