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Application for Marriage

Application for Marriage

Most Yeligible Bachellar from the South !!!!

Madam:

I am an olden young uncle living only with myself in Bangaloru, India. Having seen your advertisement for marriage purposes, I decided to press myself on you and hope you will take me nicely.

I am a soiled son from inside Karnataka. I am nice and big, six foot tall and six inches long. My body is filled with hardness, as because I am working hardly. I am playing hardly also. Especially I like cricket and I am a good batter and I am fast baller. Whenever I come running in for balling, other batters start running. Everybody is scared of my rapid balls that bounce a lot.

I am very nice man. I am always laughing loudly at everyone. I am a jolly gay.

Especially ladies, they are saying I am nice and soft. I am always giving respect to the ladies. I am always allowing ladies to get on top. That is how nice I am.

I am not having any bad habits. I am not drinking and I am not sucking tobacco or anything else. Every morning I am going to the gym and I am pumping like anything. Daily I am pumping and pumping. If you want you can come and see how much I am pumping the dumb belles in the gym.

I am having a lot of money in my pants and my pants is always open for you. I am such a nice man, but still I am living with myself only. What to do? So I am taking things into my own hands everyday. That is why I am pressing myself on you, so that you will come in my house and take my things into your hand.

If you are marrying me madam, I am telling you, I will be loving you very hard every day. In fact, I will stop pumping dumb belles in the gym.

If you are not marrying me madam and not coming to me, I will press you and press you until you come. So I am placing my head between your nicely smelling feet and looking up with lots of hope. I am waiting very badly for your reply and I am stiff with anticipation.

Expecting soon,
Yours and only yours
C.S.V.L.T. Rao




More Adult Hindi Jokes

Bihar Driving License

DERIVING LICENSE APPLIKASON

NOTE: Please do not soot the person at the applikason kounter.

He will give you the licen.

If you dot know how to fill, copy from your phriend (friend) applikason.

For phurthar instructions, see bottom applikason.

1. Last name:

(_) Yadav (_) Sinha (_) Pandey (_) Misra (_) Don't no

(Check karet box)

2. phust name:

(_) Ramprasad (_) Lakhan (_) Sivprasad (_) Jamnaprasad (_) Don't no

(Check karet box)

3. Age:

(_) Less than phipty (_) Greater than phipty (_) Don't no

(Check karet box)

4. Sex: ____ M _____(F) _____ not sure _____not applicable

5. Chappal Size: ____ Lepht ____ Right

6.Occupason:

(_) Politison (_) Doodhwala (_) Pehelwaan (_) House wife (_) Un-employed

(Check karet box)

7. Number of children libing in the household: ___

8. Number that are yourj: ___

9. Mather name: _______________________

10. Phather Name: ____________________ (If not no, leabe blank)

11. Ejjucason: 1 2 3 4 (Circle highest kilass attended)

12. Dental rekard:

(_) Ellow (_) Berownish-ellow (_) Berown (_) Belack (_) Other -__________ Give egjhakt color

(Check karet box)

13.Your thumb imparesson :

____________________________

(If you are copying from another applikason pharom, pleaje do not copy thumb impression also. Pleaje provide your own thumb impression.)

PELEAJE DO NOT USE PHINGERS OF YOUR LEGS

Use thumb on your lepht hand only. If you dont have lepht hand, use your thumb on right hand. If you do not have right hand, use thumb on lepht hand.

NOTE : IF YOU DONT HAVE BOTH HANDS, YOU CANNOT DERIVE.

WE ARE VARY ISTRICT ABOUT THIS

TAJ MAHAL POETRY

As a bachelor:
takdir hai magar
kismat nahi khulti
taj mahal banana chahata hoon
magar mumtaj nahi milti.

As a lover:
takdir hai magar
kismat nahi khulti
taj mahal banana chahata hoon
magar mumtaj shaadi nahi karti.

As a husband:
Takdir hai magar
kismat nahi khulti
taj mahal banana chahata hoon
magar mumtaj nahi marti.

The letter by HR Microsoft

The letter issued by HR Microsoft.....

Subject: MEMO TO INDIAN STAFF from Microsoft Corp HRD dept.

This one is extremely funny. And what makes it funnier is the fact.. That it is a REAL memo from Microsoft. Every word here is quite intact and no word has been altered.

The following is an ACTUAL internal memo from the Human Resources Director of Microsoft.

*****************

A memo from the Human Resources Director of Microsoft.

To all Hindi-speaking staff It has been brought to our attention by several officials visiting our corporate headquarters that offensive language is commonly used by our Hindi-speaking staff.

Such behavior, in addition to violating our policy, is highly unprofessional and offensive to both visitors and colleagues.

Staff will IMMEDIATELY adhere to the following rules:

Words like "****IYA, GANDU" and other such expressions will not be used for emphasis, no matter how heated the discussion. You will not say "****IYE AKAL NAHI HAI KYA TEREKO" when someone makes a mistake, or "***** CHOD, BHENCHOD" when a major mistake has been made. All forms derived from the verb "CHOD" are inappropriate in our environment.

No project manager, section head or administrator, under any circumstances, will be referred to as "GADHA", or "****IYA". Lack of determination will not be referred to as "KAAMCHOR SALA", and neither will persons who lack initiative be referred to as "AALSI BHOSDIKA", or "*****CHOD".

Do not say "GAND FADU" if a person is persistent, or if a task is heavy to accomplish. In a similar way, do not use "GAND FATI NA", if a colleague is going through a difficult situation.

Furthermore, you must not say "BHOSDE MEIN GAYA" when matters become complicated. Do not ever substitute 'May I help you?' with "BOL TERI KAISE GAND MARUU"?

When things get tough, an acceptable expression such as 'We are going through a difficult time' should be used, rather than "MAA CHUDI PADI HAI" or "TATTE MUH MEIN HAI" No salary increase shall be ever referred to as "KHAIRAAT BAATI HAI".

Last, but not least, after reading this memo, please do not say "YE KAGAJ GAND PONCHNE KE LAAYAK BHI NAHI HAI". Just keep it clean and dispose off it properly. We hope you will keep these directions in mind.

Show More Adult Hindi Jokes
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