Funeral

The old man had died. A wonderful funeral was in progress and the country preacher talked at length of the good traits of the deceased, what an honest man he was, and what a loving husband and kind father he was.

Finally, the widow leaned over and whispered to one of her children, "Go up there and take a look in the coffin and see if that's your pa."




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Insurance matter

A man has a headache and goes to see the doctor. The doctor says "I have bad news and good news. The bad new is that you have a brain tumor.

The good news is that we can do a brain transplant, and we have just admoitted a couple who was in a car accident. We can get you one of their brains. The male brain will cost your insurance company $100,000, and the female brain will cost $30,000."

The man says "I hate to be rude, but why does the male brain cost so much more than the female brain?" The doctor replies "Because the male brain has never been used."

True-False

TRUE-FALSE

A little kids in school, taking a true-false test and he is flipping a coin. After the test he is flipping the coin again.

The teacher says, "What are you doing?" He says, "Checking my answers."

Allow drinking

Reasons to allow drinking in Workplace

1. It is an incentive to show up.

2. It reduces stress.

3. It leads to more honest communications.

4. It reduces complaints about low pay.

5. It cuts down on time off because you can work with a hangover.

6. Employees tell management what they think not what management wants to hear.

7. It helps save on heating costs in the winter.

8. It encourages carpooling.

9. Increases job satisfaction because if you have a bad job you do not care.

10. It eliminates vacations because people would rather come to work.

11. It makes fellow employees look better.

12. It makes the cafeteria food taste better.

13. Bosses are more likely to hand out raises when they have had a couple of drinks.

14. Salary negotiations are a lot more profitable.

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