Ijjat

Movie :- Sholay

Basanti:- Dhanoo bhag meri ijjat khatre mai hai

Basanti :- Bhag Jaldi Dahnno

Dhanoo : - Meri Bhi ijjat khatre mai hai

Basanti :- kaise

Dhanoo :- daku ghode pai aa rahe hai




More Adult Hindi Jokes

Laloo's Call

Laloo Yadav went to London. One evening, he felt like talking to his wife and dialed his residence.

Laloo Yadav: O-Hallooo!

Reply: Hello!

Laloo Yadav smirks as it is an unfamiliar male voice.

He says: Kaun bol raha hai?

Reply: Shaab, main Bahadur.

Laloo Yadav: Bahadur, where did you come from?

Bahadur: Shaab, memsahaab has kept me here.

Laloo Yadav shifts uneasily on learning that Rabris daring at keeping a pahari Bahadur just the day he has left home.

He says: Ok, go and call memsaab.

Bahadur - Shaab, Memshaab is sleeping with Shaab!

Laloo Yadav turns red and wild with anger. He screams into the phone: Listen Bahadur, listen to me. I am your real Sahib.

Bahadur: But then who is sleeping with Memshaab?

Laloo Yadav: Woh koi ullu ka pattha hai. Go to the drawing room and get my gun which is hanging there.

After a few seconds Bahadur comes back: Shaab, Ive got the gun!

Laloo Yadav: And just around there in the drawers should be the bullets, take them and fit them into the gun.

After a minute Bahadur replies: Shaab, its ready now.

Laloo Yadav: Now go and kill both the the Memsahib and the fake Sahib!

Two gunshots are heard and Bahadur comes back to the phone: Shaab, Ive shot both of them, what do I do with the dead bodies?

Laloo Yadav: Just dig a hole in the garden and bury both of them in it.

Bahadur: Shaab, I don't get it! This is the fifteenth floor, theres no garden here!

Laloo Yadav: Oh, sorry, wrong number!

Last wish

Once upon a time there were three prisoners: a Hindu, a Christian and a Sardarji. The trio were to executed using a guillotine.

The final day arrived and they were lined up to be fed to the mighty blades of the the law.

So first came the hindu.

As a matter of convention, the jailor asked him if he had a last wish.

He never bothered for a wish just before dying and so he put up a whole hearted prayer to Bhagwan and placed his head in the guillotine.

His prayers proved to be wonderful, the blade did not fall down. HE WAS PARDONED.

Next came the Christian.

So once again out of his compulsion the jailor asked if they could do something as a last wish of his.

The Christian also never obliged and offered his sincere last pryers to Jesus Christ before placing his head no the chopper.

"All glories to the almighty" the guillotine again stopped at the edge of the convict's neck. HE WAS PARDONED.

Now came the sardarji's turn who was already quite pissed off at the two bizzare pardons just before him.

So yet once again as a matter of sheer practice the jailor again enquired from the sardarji regarding any last wishes that he had.

Since sardarji was already vey seriously upset about the whole debacle, all that he could say was:

"I give a rat's ass to a wish, why the hell don't you get your frigging machine set right first???"

Inspection

There was one naughty boy studying in class and a Biology inspection was scheduled on next day. So the class teacher told the students in the class that tomorrow is inspection and everyone has to attend the class compulsary and the inspector is going to come in biology class.

The inspector will ask u one quation like this, the teacher asked, "SARIR KA SABSE NAJUK AAUNG KAUNSA HAI"

Every studend had put their fingers up. First student said "Eye!"

Teacher,"Why?"

Student, "When something goes in eye, then one may loose eye sight."

In similar ways some says nose, ears, etc. Now it is the turn of naughty boy. He says "GAAND" The teacher was astonished and asked his reasoning.

The naught boy says, "If u r alone in jungle and u see lion which is far away to TUMARI GAAND FAAT TI HAI"

Teacher, "Shut up! And u don't come tomorrow. If u come, don't open your mouth!"

Next day the inspector comes and ask the same Q. " SARIR KA SABSE NAJUK AANG KAUNSA HAI?" Every student in the class had put their fingers up except that naughty boy. The inspector went to the naughty boy and asked why he doesn't know the answer. The class teacher went to inspector at this point and told him he is not a good boy so please don't ask him any question.

But the inspector told class teacher, "I want to know why he doesn't know the answer." Then he continued to the boy, "Don't be afraid! Give me any answer that u know"

Naught boy told "GAAND". The inspector is astonished and the teacher is very afraid.

Inspector ask's, "KYON"

"KYON KI SAWAAL AAP HUME PUCHH RAHE HO AUR GAAND FAAT RAHI HAI TEACHER KI"

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