Pinocchio and Splinters

Pinocchio and Splinters

One day Pinocchio came to Gepetto with a problem. "Every time I have sex with my girlfriend, she gets splinters. What can I do about this?"

"Have you tried sandpaper?" Pinocchio hadn't, so he went to try it.

"Pinnochio," said Gepetto a few weeks later. "How is the problem work out with your "Girlfriend?" said Pinnochio. "Who needs a girlfriend when you have sandpaper?"

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4 types of sex

4 types of women having sex

a- asthematic- ah... aahh.. aaahhh
b- obedient - yes..yees.yyyeeeesss....
c- unsatisfied- more...mmmore...mmmmooorrreee
d- religious - oh god...ooh ggood...oooohhhgggoooddd.!!

Not a Virgin

Jack had a blind date with Jill for the prom and, as the evening progressed, he found himself attracted to her more and more. After some really passionate embracing, he said, "Tell me, do you object to making love?"

"That is something I have never done before," Jill replied.

"Never made love? You mean you are a virgin?" Jack was amazed.

"No, silly!" she giggled. "Never objected!"

Good & Bad News

One day God came to Adam to pass on some news. "I've got some good news and some bad news", God said. Adam looked at God and said, "Well, give me the good news first."

Smiling, God explained, "I've got two new organs for you. One is called a brain. It will allow you to be very intelligent, create new things, and have intelligent conversations with Eve. The other organ I have for you is called a penis. It will allow you to reproduce your now intelligent life form and populate this planet.

Eve will be very happy that you now have this organ to give her children." Adam, very excited, exclaimed, "These are great gifts you have given to me. What could possibly be bad news after such great tidings?"

God looked upon Adam and said with great sorrow, "The bad news is that when I created you, I only gave you enough blood to operate one of these organs at a time."

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