A woman's dream

A woman's dream

A man went into a pharmacy and asked to talk to a male pharmacist. The woman he was talking to said that she was the pharmacist and that she and her sister owned the store, so there were no males employed there.

She then asked if there was something which she could help the gentleman with. The man said that it was something that he would be much more comfortable discussing with a male pharmacist.

The female pharmacist assured him that she was completely professional and whatever it was that he needed to discuss, he could be confident that she would treat him with the highest level of professionalism.

The man agreed and began by saying "this is tough for me to discuss, but I have a permanent erection which causes me a lot of problems and severe embarrassment. So I was wondering what you could give me for it?"

The pharmacist said "Just a minute, I'll go talk to my sister."

When she returned, she said, "We discussed it at length and the absolute best we can do is 1/3 ownership in the store, a company car, and $3000 a month living expenses...

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Getting Bigger Boobs

A woman keeps asking her husband if her boobs are so small. "Does this shirt make them look bigger? Does this one make them look smaller?" she asks.

The next day her husband buys her a mirror. Before bed, she always looks in the mirror and asks her husband, "Does this shirt make them look bigger? Does this one make them look smaller?"

Finally he gets so annoyed that he says, "I know how to make them larger!"

"How!?!?!?" she asks.

"Take a bunch of toilet paper and rub it in between your boobs."

"Well how long does it take?" she asks.

"They should expand over the years," he answers.

"How did you know that?" she wonders.

"I don't no, but it sure worked for your ass, didn't it?"

Use More Soap

A woman sends her clothing out to the local laundry. When it comes back there are still stains in her panties. The next week she encloses a note to the laundryman that says, "Use more soap on panties."

This goes on for several weeks, the woman sending the same note to the laundry, "Use more soap on panties."

Finally fed up, the laundry man responded with his own note that said, "Use more paper on ass."

Like Dad

A mother found her son scooping ice cream in the kitchen and was mad.

Mom : "Dinner is going to be ready in an hour, put that ice cream away and go play."

Son : "But mom, there's no one to play with."

Mom : "I'll play with you, what do you wanna play?"

Son : "Lets play mommy and daddy, you go upstairs and lay down on the bed."

The mom said ok and went upstairs. The son put on his dad's fishing hat and lit up one of his dad's cigarettes. He went upstairs and opened the door.

Mom : "Now what do I do?"

Son : "Get your ass out of bed, you whore, and fix that kid some fucking ice cream."

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