CRICKET: As explained to a foreigner....
You have two sides, one out in the field and one on in. Each man that's in the side that's in goes out, and when he's out he comes in and the next man goes in until he's out. Sometimes you get men still in and not out.
When a man goes out to go in, the men who are out try to get him out, and when he is out he goes in and the next man in goes out and goes in. There are two men called umpires who stay all out all the time and they decide when the men who are in are out. When both sides have been in and all the men have out, and both sides have been out twice after all the men have been in, including those who are not out, that is the end of game.
* An American had been to go to a cricket match while he was in England. He watched with pleasure as the team came out and the batsman scored four runs off the six balls. then the umpire called "OVER". "Well", he said, getting up, "It's a nice game-but it's too short."
More Sports Jokes
Three guys go to a ski lodge, and there aren't enough rooms, so they have to share a bed.
In the middle of the night, the guy on the right wakes up and says, "I had this wild, vivid dream of getting a hand job!"
The guy on the left wakes up, and unbelievably, he's had the same dream, too.
Then the guy in the middle wakes up and says, "That's funny, I dreamed I was skiing!"
Mary was having an affair during the day while her husband was at work. One day, she was in bed with her boyfriend Ralph, when she heard her husband's car pull in the driveway.
She yelled at Ralph, "Hurry! grab your clothes and jump out the window, my husband is home early!"
Ralph looked out the window and said, "I can't jump out the window! It's raining like hell out there."
Mary cried, "If my husband catches us in here, he will kill both of us!"
So, Ralph grabbed his clothes and jumped out the window. When he landed outside he found himself in the middle of a marathon race, so he started running along side the others, only he was still in the nude, carrying his clothes on his arm.
One of the runners asked him, "Do you always run in the nude?"
Ralph answered, while gasping for air, "Oh yes, it feels so free having the air blow over your skin while you are running."
Then another runner asked, "Do you always run carrying your clothes on your arm?"
Ralph answered breathlessly, "Oh yes, that way I can get dressed at the end of the run and get in my car to go home."
Then another runner asked, "Do you always wear a condom when you run?"
Ralph answered, "Only if it's raining!"
The cricketer was proud of his progress as a batsman and invited his mother-in-law along to watch him play, hoping to impress her.
At the crease, he turned to the wicket-keeper and said 'I'm anxious to do well and really hit this ball. That's my wife's mother over there.'
'Don't be silly,' said the wicket-keeper. 'You'll never hit her at two hundred yards.