Once Banta saw Santa in a brand new Convertible Porsche.
Banta asked Santa - Where did you get such a nice Car?
Santa replied - Well, I was walking yesterday on a Beach minding my own business when a beautiful woman rode up on this Car. She came out of the Car, took off all her Clothes and said, Take whatever you want.
Banta added approvingly - Good choice; the clothes probably wouldn't have fitted you.
More Sardar Jokes
A man was brought in to the hospital intensive care ward, put in a bed, tubes coming out everywhere. A week later, another man was admitted, in a similar condition.
Both lay there, machines pinging, tubes poking etc. a couple more weeks before one of them had the strength to raise his hand and point to himself and say, "Bengali."
The other patient signaled he had heard, raised his own hand, and said, "Punjabi."
This act tired them out so badly it was a week before the first summoned up the strength to say, "Calcutta."
Other replied in a weedy frail voice, "Ludhiana."
Once more, the strain was too much for them both and they passed out. Days passed before the first patient managed to again point to himself and say, "Asit."
Replied the other, "Santa."
A few hours later, Asit managed to point to himself again and rasp out weakly, "Cancer."
Santa responded, "Sagittarius."
There was a couple, Banta and Preeto, going at it for the first time, and they were going at it for a while when suddenly Banta asks Preeto to open her legs a little wider.
She does and they continue.
A few minutes go by and Banta asks her again, "Open your legs a little wider".
Preeto does, then he asks again, "a little wider hun".
Preeto starts getting pissed off but she does it. Till finally he asks again, "Can you open them just a little wider?"
So she finally yells, "What are you trying to do get your balls in too?"
Banta says, "No, I'm trying to get them out."
Banta was getting ready to close his bar for the night when a robber with a ski mask burst in and pulls a gun.
He yells to Banta, "This is a stick-up! Put all your dough in this bag!"
The scared Banta pleads, "Don't shoot, please! I'll do as you say!"
The robber yells, "Shut up and empty the cash register!"
Banta says, "Okay, okay! Just don't shoot, I have a wife and kids! I'll do whatever you say!"
The crook takes the money then puts the gun to the Banta's head and says, Alright, now give me a blowjob!"
"Anything!" cries Banta, "Just don't shoot!"
Banta starts to blow the crook. As the crook gets excited, he drops the gun.
Banta sees the gun on the floor, picks it up, hands it back to the crook and yells, "Hold the gun, damn it! Somebody might walk in!"