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Do it in my style

Do it in my style

A man is walking down the street, and he's really horny. So he goes to the first whore house he sees and approached a prostitute.

He asked her, "How much do you charge for the hour?"

"1000 bucks," she replied.

"Do you do My-style?" he asked.

Not knowing exactly what this was, she refused.

He tried to sweeten the deal and said, "I'll pay you 2000 to do it My-style."

Again she declined.

Being the persistent type, he laid down a final offer. "I'll give you 5000 to go My-style with me! What do you say?"

Finally, she agrees, thinking, "Well I've been in the game for over ten years now. I've been there and done that, and had every kind of request from weirdos from all over the world. How kinky could His-style be?"

After an hour of every possible way and position, she turned to him and said, "That was fantastic, but I was expecting something perverted and disgusting. Where does the 'Your-style' come in?"

The man popped a can of beer and replied, "I pay you next month when I get my check."




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Ex-Boyfriends

Four School friends meet at their School Reunion. One of the friends goes to bathroom and the others start to talk about their sons...

Guy 1: You know my son? I'm so proud of him 'cause he was so successful. He became so rich that he gave one of his best friends a 2-million dollar Mansion for free!

Guy 2: Really? My son's made me proud too. He's become so rich from acting and gave his closest friend 2 free Hummer H2's.

Guy 3: Even my son got rich. He won the 8 million-dollar Lotto and he bought his friend a private yacht and jet.

The fourth High school Guy comes back from the bathroom and overhears them talking about their sons. So he began to tell them about his son.

Guy 4: Yeah, well, my son hasn't been as successful like your sons have. He's gay and works at a gay stripping joint for a living.

Guy 1: What a shame.

Guy 4: No, not really. He lives in a 2-million dollar mansion, owns his own jet and yacht, and owns 2 Hummer H2's which were all given to him by 3 of his Ex-boyfriends.

Smart Daughter

The mother of a 17-year-old girl was concerned that her daughter was having sex.

Worried the girl might become pregnant, and adversely impact the family's status, she consulted the family doctor.

The doctor told her that teenagers today were very willful, and any attempt to stop the girl would probably result in rebellion. He then told her to arrange for her daughter to be put on birth control and, until then, talk to her and give her a box of condoms.

Later that evening, as her daughter was preparing for a date, the woman told her about the situation and handed her a box of condoms.

The girl started to laugh and reached over to hug her mother saying, "Oh Mum! You don't have to worry about that! I'm dating Maria!"

Spoon & String

A man entered a restaurant and sat at the only open table. As he sat down, he knocked the spoon off the table with his elbow. A nearby waiter reached into his shirt pocket, pulled out a clean spoon, and set it on the table. The diner was impressed. "Do all the waiters here carry spoons in their pockets?"

The waiter replied, "Yes. Ever since an Efficiency Expert visited our restaurant... He determined that 17.8% of our diners knock the spoon off the table. By carrying clean spoons with us, we save trips to the kitchen."

The diner ate his meal. As he was paying the waiter, he commented, "Forgive the intrusion, but do you know that you have a string hanging from your fly?"

The waiter replied, "Yes, we all do. Seems that the same Efficiency Expert determined that we spend to much time washing our hands after using the men's room. So, the other end of that string is tied to my penis. When I need to go, I simply pull the string, do my thing, and then return to work. Having never touched myself, there really is no need to wash my hands. Saves a lot of time."

"Wait a minute," said the diner, "how do you get your penis back in your pants?"

"Well, I don't know about the other guys, but I use the spoon."

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