Every one knows me
Banta was bragging to his boss one day," You know, I know everyone there is to know. Just name someone, anyone, and I know them." Tired of his boasting, his boss called his bluff, "OK, Banta how about Tom Cruise?"
"Sure, yes, Tom and I are old friends, and I can prove it." So Banta and his boss fly out to Hollywood and knock on Tom Cruise's door, and sure enough,Tom Cruise, shouts, "Banta! Great to see you! You and your friend come right in and join me for lunch!"
Although impressed, Banta's boss is still skeptical. After they leave Cruise's house, he tells Banta that he thinks Banta knowing Cruise was just lucky. "No, no, just name anyone else," Banta says.
"President Bush," his boss quickly retorts. "Yes," Banta says, "I know him, let's fly out to Washington." At the White House, Bush spots Banta on the tour and motions him and his boss over, saying, "Banta, what a surprise, I was just on my way to a meeting, but you and your friend come on in and have a cup of coffee first."
Well, the boss is very shaken by now, but still not totally convinced. After they leave the White House, he expresses his doubts to Banta, who again implores him to name anyone else. "The Pope," his boss replies.
"Sure!" says Banta. "My folks are from Poland, and I have known the Pope a long time." So they fly to Rome.
Banta and his boss are assembled with the masses in Vatican Square when Banta says, "This will never work. I cannot catch the Pope's eye among all these people. Tell you what, I know all the guards so let me just go upstairs and I will come out on the balcony with the Pope." And he disappears into the crowd headed toward the Vatican.
Sure enough, half an hour later Banta emerges with the Pope on the balcony. But by the time Banta returns, he finds that his boss has had a heart attack and is surrounded by paramedics. Working his way to his boss's side, Banta asks him, "What happened?" His boss looks up and says," I was doing fine until you and the Pope came out on the balcony and the man next to me said," Who is that on the balcony with Banta?"
More Hindi Jokes
Indians to be sent on Moon
Manmohan Singh to Bush - We are sending Indians to the moon next year.
Bush - Wow! How Many?
Manmohan Singh - 100
25 - OBC
25 - SC
20 - ST
5 - Handicapped
5 - Sports Persons
5 - Terrorist Affected
5 - Kashmiri Migrants
9 - Politicians
and if possible 1 - Astronnaut
If the Film "Titanic" was made in India
1) There would be 10 times as many people on the ship.
2) There would be a song with Kate Winslet in a white saree and of course singing in the rain!.
3) The movie would be called "Pyar Kiya To Marna Kya".
4) Hero and Heroine would float in cold water for days and still survive, but the villian would die in the first dip.
5) The iceberg would be sent by the heroine's father to teach the hero a lesson.
6) None of the women would float due to heavy designer sarees.
And last but not least.
7) Half of the rescue boats would be reserve for SC/ST/OBC.
Two cowboys come upon an Indian lying on his stomach with his ear to the ground. One of the cowboys stops and says to the other, "You see that Indian?"
"Yeah," says the other cowboy.
"Look," says the first one, "he's listening to the ground. He can hear things for miles in any direction."
Just then the Indian looks up. "Covered wagon," he says, "about two miles away. Have two horses, one brown, one white. Man, woman, child, household effects in wagon."
"Incredible!" says the cowboy to his friend. "This Indian knows how far away they are, how many horses, what color they are, who is in the wagon, and what is in the wagon. Amazing!"
The Indian looks up and says, "Ran over me about a half hour ago."