Rowing Your Boat
Two blondes were driving along a road by a wheat field when they saw a blonde in the middle of the field rowing a row boat.
The driver blonde turned to her friend and said "You know - it's blondes like that that give us a bad name!"
To this, the other blonde replies "I know it, and if I knew how to swim, I'd go out there and drown her."
More Blonde Jokes
A blonde woman goes into her lawyers office requesting a divorce. He is taking all of her background information and asks her, "Do you have grounds for a divorce?"
To which she replies, "Well, we have three acres."
"No, ma'am. What I mean is, does he beat you up?" asks the attorney.
"No, I get up around 6:00 and he sleeps until 7:30," she responds.
Feeling frustrated the attorney asks, "Lady, tell me, do you have a grudge?"
Looking very confident she states, "No, we have a carport."
At this point the lawyer has lost his patience and asks, "Look, lady, why do you want a divorce?"
"Because he can't hold an intelligent conversation!"
A plane is on its way to Montreal when a blonde in Economy Class gets up and moves to the First Class section and sits down. The flight attendant watches her do this and asks to see her ticket. She then tells the blonde that she paid for economy and that she will have go sit in the back.
The blonde replies "I'm blonde, I'm beautiful, I'm going to Montreal and I'm staying right here!" The flight attendant goes into the cockpit and tells the pilot and co-pilot that there is some blonde bimbo sitting in First Class that belongs in Economy and won't move back to her seat.
The co-pilot goes back to the blonde and tries to explain that because she only paid for Economy she will have to leave and return to her seat. The blonde replies, "I'm blonde, I'm beautiful, I'm going to Montreal and I'm staying right here!" The co-pilot tells the pilot that he probably should have the police waiting when they land to arrest this blonde woman that won't listen to reason.
The pilot says "I'll handle this. I'm married to a blonde and I have learned to speak 'blonde'!" He goes back to the blonde, whispers in her ear, and without question she gets up and moves back to her seat in the Economy section. The flight attendant and co-pilot are amazed and ask him what he said to make her move without any fuss. "I told her First Class isn't going to Montreal."
A blonde is walking down the street with her blouse open and her right breast hanging out.
A policeman approaches her and says, "Madam, are you aware that I could cite you for indecent exposure?"
She says, "Why, officer?" "Because your breast is hanging out."
She looks down and says, "Oh my God, I left the baby on the bus again!"