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Service Charge

Service Charge

A young farm-girl answers the door and sees an older neighbour standing there.

"My paw ain't home," the young girl says, "but I know what you want and I am sure I can help you. You want our bull to service your cow. Well, my paw charges one hundred and fifty dollars for his best bull."

"That's not I want," growled the neighbour

"We also have a young bull who is just starting out. My paw charges one hundred dollars fer him," she replies.

"That's not I want either," growls the neighbour.

"Well then, we have an old bull out in the pasture. He can still do the job. My paw charges only fifty dollars for him." she informs him.

"That's not what I want at all. I came here to see your pa about that-there brother o' your'n. Your brother Elmer made my daughter pregnant," the neighbour hisses.

"Oh. I guess you'll have to see my paw about that then, 'coz I don't know what he charges fer Elmer."




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Not a Virgin any more

A family is lunching: The 10 year old girl does not eat much.

At the end of one moment, she says: "I have something to announce", Silence and all listen. "I am not virgin any more", and she starts to cry.

Again a long silence... and then....

The father addresses to his wife: "It is all your fault, always equipped and made up like a whore, you believe that you are an example for your daughter? ... It is lamentable".

The woman says to her husband: "And you, you believe that you are an example? To waste your pay with p├ętasses which come sometimes to accompany you back, you believe that you are an example for your 10 year old daughter?

"And the father to continue: "And her older sister, this good with nothing, with
her hairy and doped buddy, always in the train of tripoter and to jump itself in
all the recesses of the house, you believe that it is an example?... And that
continues like that.......

The grandmother takes her small daughter by the shoulders to comfort her and
asks her: "How that arrive? "And the small one to answer by choking its sobs:
"the priest chose another girl to make the Virgin in the Crib of Christmas."

Burning Love

Q:) What is the definition of "Burning Love" ?

A:) I'ts when in night you reach out for the Vaseline and pick up Vicks Vaporub by mistake!!

Party Girl

A high school girl finally had the opportunity to go to a party all alone.

Since she was very good looking, she was a bit nervous about what to do if boys hit on her. Her Mom said,

"It is very easy! Whenever a boy starts hitting on you, you ask him 'What will be the name of our baby?', that will scare them off." So off she went.

After a little while at the party a boy started dancing with her and, little by little, kissing her and touching her. She asked him, "What will our baby be called?"

The boy found some excuse and disappeared. Some time later the same thing happened again, a boy started to kiss her neck, her shoulders... she stopped him and asked him 'What will be the name of our baby?',

He ran off.

Later on, another boy invited her for a walk. After a few minutes he started kissing her and she asked him, "What will our baby be called?"

He continued, now slowly taking her clothes off. "What will our baby be called?" she asked once more.

He began to have sex with her. "What will our baby be called?!" she asked again.

After he was done, he peeled off his condom, tied it in a knot and said,

"...if he gets out of this one... Failed Rubber!"

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