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At Three o'clock

At Three o'clock

A well dressed business man was walking down the street when a little kid covered in soot said to him respectfully, "Sir, can you tell me the time?" The man stopped, carefully unbuttoned his coat and jacket, removed a large watch from a vest pocket, looked at it and said, "It is a quarter to three, young man."

"Thanks," said the boy. "At exactly three o'clock you can kiss my ass." With that, the kid took off running, and with an angry cry, the outraged businessman started chasing him. He had not been running long when an old friend stopped him.

"Why are you running like this at your age?" asked the friend. Gasping and almost incoherent with fury, the business man said, "That little brat asked me the time and when I told him it was quarter to three he told me that at exactly three, I should kiss his ass!"

"So what's your hurry," said the friend. "You still have ten minutes."




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Thumb stuck in the food

A man goes into a restaurant and orders soup. When the waiter brings out the bowl he has his thumb stuck in the soup, but the customer decides to let it go.

"Would you like anything else?" the waiter inquires. "We have some very good roast beef today." "Sounds good," says the customer. So the waiter goes off and comes back with a plate of roast beef, and his thumb is in the gravy. The customer is getting pissed now, but decides to hold his tongue.

"How about some hot apple pie?" asks the waiter. "Fine," says the customer. The waiter returns with his thumb stuck in the pie. Now the customer is really getting furious.

"Coffee?" asks the waiter, and when the customer nods yes, he hurries off. He returns with his thumb stuck in the cup of coffee. By now the customer can no longer restrain himself.

Customer - "What the hell do you think you're doing? Every time you've come to the table you've had your thumb stuck in my food!"

Waiter - "I've got an infection and my doctor told me to keep my thumb in a hot, moist place."

Customer - "Why don't you just stick it up your ass?"

Waiter - "Where do you think I put it when I'm in the kitchen?"

Most Important Role

Two daughters had been given parts in a Christmas pageant at their Church. At dinner that night, they got into an argument as to who had the most important role.

Finally the 10 year old said to her younger sister, "Well you just ask Mom. She'll tell you it's much harder to be a virgin than it is to be an angel."

Examination

Once a boy was having his school examination. As soon as he got the question paper, he started stripping below his waist.

The shocked teacher asked him what he was doing.

The reply was, "The examination paper says 'Write in brief'!"

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