Just some thoughts...
* If your father is a poor man, it is your fate but, if your father-in-law is a poor man, it's your stupidity.
* I was born intelligent - education ruined me.
* A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where train stops. On my desk, I have a, work station... What more can I say.
* If it's true that we are here to help others, then, what exactly are the others here for?
* Since light travels faster than sound, people appear bright Until you hear them speak.
* How come "abbreviated" is such a long word?
* Your future depends on your dreams So go to sleep!
More Funny Jokes
Trying to find just the right name for your child? Why not pick one of these? Just find your profession below and we have the right name for you!
Lawyer's daughter: Sue
Thief's son: Rob
Lawyer's son: Will
Doctor's son: Bill
Fisherman's daughter: Annette
Hair stylist's son: Bob
Homeopathic doctor's son: Herb
Justice of the peace's daughter: Mary
Sound stage technician's son: Mike
Gambler's daughter: Bette
Iron worker's son: Rusty
TV star's daughter: Emmy
Movie star's son: Oscar
A guy walks into Dunkin Donuts. He says, "Excuse me, miss...how many cups of coffee do you think this thermos will hold?" She says, "I think its a seven-cup thermos." He says, "All right...give me two black, three cream and sugar."
A drunken Irishman gets on a train and asks the conductor how long the trip is between Limerick to Cork.
"About two hours," says the conductor.
"Okay," says the drunkard, "then how long is the trip between Cork to Limerick?"
The iritated conductor says to the drunk "It's still about two hours, laddie. Why'd ya think there'd be a difference?"
"Well," says the drunk, "It's only a week between Christmas and New Year's, but it's a helluva long time between New Year's and Christmas!"