An optician was teching his son how to improve business through the use of the psychological approach.
Son, after you fit the glasses, the customer asks, 'What's the charge'?
You say, "The charge is $10" then pause and watch for the flinch. If the customer does not flinch, you add, "That's for the frames. The lenses will be another ten bucks."
Then you pause again but this time just slightly and again study the reaction. If the customer still does not flinch, you say "Each!"
More Funny Jokes
Chinese For Dummies
I stepped in poop: Dung On Mai Shu
Let's sleep together: Ai Wan Tu Bang Yu
An unattractive woman: Fat ho
You need a face lift: Chin Tu Fat
Approach me: Kum Hia
A great achievement of the American space program: Moon Lan Ding
There is no reason to raise your voice: Wai U Shao Ting
Serving drinks to people: Ten Ding Ba
Cleaning an automobile: Wa Shing Kah
Are you trying to save electricity: Wai So Dim
Freshman: Is never in bed past noon.
Senior: Is never out of bed before noon.
Freshman: Reads the syllabus to find out what classes he can cut.
Senior: Reads the syllabus to find out what classes he needs to attend.
Freshman: Brings a can of soda into a lecture hall.
Senior: Brings a jumbo hoagie and six-pack of Mountain Dew into a recitation class.
Freshman: Calls the professor "Teacher".
Senior: Calls the professor "Bob."
Freshman: Would walk ten miles to get to class.
Senior: Drives to class if it's more than three blocks away.
Freshman: Memorizes the course material to get a good grade.
Senior: Memorizes the professor's habits to get a good grade.
Freshman: Has to ask where the computer labs are.
Senior: Has own personal workstation.
Freshman: Lines up for an hour to buy his textbooks in the first week.
Senior: Starts to think about buying textbooks in October... maybe.
Freshman: Is proud of his A+ on Calculus I midterm
Senior: Is proud of not quite failing his Complex Analysis midterm
Freshman: Conscientiously completes all homework, including optional questions
Senior: Homework? I knew I forgot to do something last night
An airline pilot had on this particular flight hammered his plane into the runway really hard.
The airline had a policy which required the first officer to stand at the door while the passengers exited, smile, and give them a "Thanks for flying XYZ airline."
In light of his bad landing, the pilot had a hard time looking the passengers in the eye, thinking that someone would have a smart comment.
Finally everyone had gotten off except for this little old lady walking with a cane.
She said, "Sonny, mind if I ask you a question?"
"Why not Ma'am," said the pilot, "what is it?"
The little old lady said, "Did we land or were we shot down?"