Americas War, Bollywood Style
Americas War, Bollywood Style
1. AMERICA ASKS WORLD TO UNITE AGAINST TERRORISM :
sathi haath badhana, sathi haath badhana,
ek akela thak jayega, milkar bojh uthana
2. UK, THE BIGGEST CHAMCHA OF US, FIRST TO SUPPORT :
ae maalik tere bande hum
3. PAK PLEDGES SUPPORT IN RETURN OF FINANCIAL HELP :
jo tumko ho pasand wahi baat kahenge,
tum din ko agar raat kaho, raat kahenge
dete na aap saath to mar jaate hum kabhike
pure hue hai aap se armaan jindagi ke
hum jindagi ko aapki saugaat kahenge
tum din ko agar raat kaho raat kahenge.
4. US SAYS IT IS PLEASED WITH PAKISTANI RESPONSE :
aap jo mere meet na hote, hotho pe mere geet na hote
5. PAK TOO PLEASED WITH US STAND, ESPECIALLY AS THEY WERE NOT ON VERY GOOD TERMS OF LATE :
PAK : kabhi raat din hum door the, din raat ka ab saath hai
US : wo bhi ittefaak ki baat thi, ye bhi ittefaak ki baat hai
6. TALIBAN SHOCKED WITH PAKISTANI STAND :
bahaaro ne mera chaman loot kar
khija ko ye ilja! am kyo de diya?
kisi ne chalo dushamani kee magar
ise dosti naam kyu de diya?
7. PAK SAYS IT HAS NO OPTION :
hum bewafa hargiz na the, par hum wafa kar na sake
8. INDIA OFFERS RE-FUELLING FACILITIES TO US :
o gore gore, o baa ke chore, kabhi meri gali aaya karo
9. US SAYS TIES WITH PAK WON`T AFFECT INDO-US RELATIONS :
na tum bewafa ho, na hum bewafa hai,
magar kya kare apani raahe juda hai
10. BUSH (B) ASKS OMAR (O) TO HAND OVER OSAMA :
B : e, kya bolta tu?
O : e, kya mai bolu?
B : sun,
O : suna!
B : deta kya Osama?
O : kya, karega? nahi diya to Osama?
B : are maarenge peetenge bomb barsaayenge war karenge aur kya?
11. TALIBAN REFUSES TO HAND OVER OSAMA :
hame tumse pyaar kitna, ye hum nahi jaante,
magar jee nahi sakte, tumhare bina!
12. ANOTHER SETBACK TO TALIBAN AS Saudi Arab, UAE SNAP TIES :
kasme waade pyaar wafa sab, baate hai baato ka kya?
koi kisi ka ! nahi ye jhoothe naate hai naato ka kya?
13. AS ATTACKS START, TALIBAN LAUNCHES ANTI - AIRCRAFT FIRE. BUT SAYS US PLANES TOO HIGH TO BE HIT :
meri arji maan le maula,
tu hai sabkuch jaanne wala,
mai hu tera maanne wala,
apni firing lift karaade,
thodi si to lift karaade
14. MUSLIM COUNTRIES SUPPORT ATTACKS, TALIBAN DISGUSTED :
dekhi jamane ki yaari, bichde sabhi baari baari
15. OSAMA DECLARES JIHAD AGAINST US :
tum humko maarte ho?
hum tumko maarte hai!
hum apne jihad ka
aailaan karte hai!
16. IN INDIA, THAKRE SAYS NO POINT IN SUPPORTING US, AS IT IS
NOT INTERESTED IN KASHMIRI TERRORISM :
tum to thehere pardesi, saath kya nibhaaoge? osama pakda jayega
to ghar ko laut jaoge
More Hindi Jokes
Some Bruce Lee PJ series
* what's Bruce Lee's four indian brothers called- Charlie
* what's Bruce Lee's black sis indian called- kali
* what's Bruce Lee's crying indian sis called- rudalee
* what's Bruce Lee's indian wife's sis called- salee
* what's Bruce Lee's indian wife called- gharwalee
* what's Bruce Lee's fav indian underwear called- Rupa-Lee
* what's Bruce Lee's favourite indian taste- imlee
* what's Bruce Lee's fav indian festival- Diwalee
* what's Bruce Lee's loafer indian brother called- Mawalee
This is how your proffession can affect you...
DOCTOR: Recently a love-bug injected in me a strange bacteria, making me desirous of marriage. I'm looking for a girl who is patient and has knowledge of all ills and pills, is religious minded and keeps away from all sins be it anasin, metasin or crosin. I promise to be a good doctor with no side effects. Apply or reply.
LAWYER: I hereby beg to solicit myself as an eligible candidate for the post of husband after marriage. The person whom I'm looking for should be strictly -a girl. The girl should be strictly a girl. The girl should be willing to surender to the service and jurisdiction of My Lord i.e. Myself. Any objection would be overruled and will not be sustained. Apply in confidence and if you have the confidence.
BEGGAR: Allah ke nam pe koi ek biwi de de, Doosre ki nahi to apni hi de de, Allah tujhe ek ke badle do dega, Hillery hogi to Monika bhi dega.
BANKER: Wanted wife who takes interest in me and credits me with her service.
SHAYER: Badi muddat ke baad ek arzoo jagi hai, Ki hum bhi shadi shuda ho jaye, Kya vajah shadi karane ki jo kahde sahi sahi, To yaroo ab khud se kaam ghar ka hota nahi.
BEVDA: Wanted a girl. Girl's father should preferably have a soda factory. I am an occasional alchoholic who drinks only when friends come home. Friends come home only seven times a week. Girl preffered will carry me from bar to ghar-bar. Meet personally or send soda for trial.
CAR MECHANIC: Wanted a sturdy wife. Should be in working condition. Should be above average and must run the household at a good average.
A daughter sends a telegram to her father on her clearing B.Ed exams, which the father receives as
"Father, your daughter has been successful in BED."
A husband, while he is on a business trip to a hill station sends a telegram to his wife "I wish you were here."
The message received by wife, "I wish you were her."
A wife with near maturing pregnancy goes to railway station to return to her husband. At the reservation counter, while her turn came, it was the last ticket. Taking pity on a very old lady next to her in the queue, she offered her berth to the old lady and sent a telegram to her husband which reached as
"Shall be coming tomorrow, heavy rush in the train, gave birth to an old lady."
A man wants to celebrate his wife's Birthday by throwing a party. So he goes to order a birthday cake.
The salesman asks him what message he wants to put on the cake. Well he thinks for a while and says let's put, "you are not getting older you are getting better".
The salesman asks "how do you want me to put it?"
The man says, Well put "You are not getting older", at the top and You are getting better" at the bottom. The real fun didn't start until the cake was opened the entire party watched the message decorated on the cake "You are not getting older at the top, You are getting better at the bottom".