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Stupid Questions, Intelligent Answer

Stupid Questions, Intelligent Answer

1. At the movies: When you meet acquaintances/friends...
Stupid Question:- Hey, what are you doing here?
Answer:- Dont u know, I sell tickets in black over here..

2. In the bus: A heavy lady wearing pointed high-heeled shoes steps on your feet...
Stupid Question:- Sorry, did that hurt?
Answer:- No, not at all, I'm on local anesthesia..... why don't you try again.

3. At a funeral: One of the teary-eyed people ask...
Stupid Question:- Why, why him, of all people.
Answer:- Why? Would it rather have been you?

4. At a restaurant: When you ask the waiter
Stupid Question:- Is the "Butter Paneer Masala" dish good??
Answer:- No, its terrible and made of adulterated cement. We occassionaly also spit in it.

5. At a family get-together: When some distant aunt meets you after years...
Stupid Question:- Munna,Chickoo, you've become so big.
Answer:- Well you haven't particularly shrunk yourself.

6. When a friend announces her wedding, and you ask...
Stupid Question:- Is the guy you're marrying good?
Answer:- No, he's a miserable wife-beating , insensitive lout...it's just the money.

7. When you get woken up at midnight by a phone call...
Stupid Question:- Sorry. were you sleeping?
Answer:- No. I was doing research on whether the Zulu tribes in Africa marry or not. You thought I was sleeping.... you dumb witted moron.

8. When you see a friend/colleague with evidently shorter hair...
Stupid Question:- Hey have you had a haircut?
Answer:- No, its autumn and I'm shedding......

9. At the dentist when he's sticking pointed objects in your mouth...
Stupid Question:- Tell me if it hurts?
Answer:- No it wont. It will just bleed.

10. You are smoking a cigarette and a cute woman asks...
Stupid Question:- Oh, so you smoke.
Answer:- Gosh, it's a miracle ............it was a piece of chalk and now it's in flames!!!




More Hindi Jokes

Sister's Name?

One guy to the other "My Sister has the lastest information, gossip on everybody.... She is always in Demand".

Oh yeah! "What do you call her?"

The other guy replied: Info-Sys!

Taj Mahal

Shahjahan Ne Taj Mahal Ki Har Deewar Ko Dekha,

Har Meenar Ko Dekha,
Har Kaleen Ko Dekha,
Aur Bola.........

(guess kya bola hoga???)
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MAA KASAM !!
BAHUT KHARCHA HO GAYA

Kill A Lion

How To Kill A Lion!

Shahrukh khan method:
Release a film like 'ASHOKA". and make the lion to watch the movie.

Govinda method:
Continously dance before the lion for 5 or 6 days.

Rahul dravid method:
Ask the lion to bowl at u. U bat for 200 balls and score 1 run.

Menaka gandhi method:
Save the lion from a danger and feed him with some vegetables continously.

George bush method:
Link the lion with osama bin laden and shoot him.

Kamal Method:
Go near the lion and cry like anything.... Lion will die of sorrow!

Jayalalitha Method:
Send Police commisioner Muthukaruppan around 2AM and kill it, while it's sleeping !

Manirathnam Method :
Make sure the lion does not get sun light and put the lion in a dark room with a single candle lighted. Keep murmering something in its ears. The lion will be highly irritated and commit suicide.

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