Spot

Paitent: "Doc I always see faded spots before my eyes"

Doctor: Didn't the new glasses help?

Paitent: Sure, now the Spots are Clearer!




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Supernatural

There was this case in the hospital's Intensive Care ward where patients always died in the same bed and on Sunday morning at 11 a.m., regardless of their medical condition. This puzzled the doctors and some even thought that it had something to do with the supernatural no one could solve the mystery..... as to Why the death at 11 AM?

So a worldwide expert team was constituted and they decide to go down to the ward to investigate the cause of the incidents. So on the next Sunday morning few minutes before 11 a.m., all doctors and nurses nervously wait outside the ward to see for themselves what the terrible phenomenon was all about. Some were holding wooden crosses, prayer books and other holy objects to ward off the evil........ Just when the clock struck 11......


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Sundeep Singh, the part time Sunday sweeper, entered the ward and unplugged the life support system so that he could use the vacuum cleaner.

Medical Entrance Exam

Definitions provided by Miss Misa Yadav, Laloo's daughter, in her Medical Entrance Exam.

ANALLY - happening every year

ANTIBODY - against everyone

ARTERY - the study of fine paintings

BACTERIA - back door to a cafeteria

BENIGN - what you be after you be eight

BOWEL - letters like a, e, i, o, u

CAESARIAN SECTION - a district in Rome

CARDIOLOGY - advanced study of poker playing

CAT SCAN - searching for lost kitty

CHRONIC - neck of a crow

COMA - punctuation mark

CORTIZONE - area around local courthouse

CYST - short for sister

DIAGNOSIS - person with a slanted nose

DILATE - (i) the late British princess Diana (ii)lives long

DISLOCATION - in this place

DUODENUM - couple in jeans

ENEMA - not a friend

FALSE LABOR - pretending to work

GENES - blue denim

GROIN - to mash to a pulp / smile

HERNIA - she is close by

HYMEN - greeting to several males

IMPOTENT - distinguished, well-known

LABOR PAIN - hurt at work

LACTOSE - person without toes

LYMPH - walk unsteadily

MENOPAUSE - I no wait

MICROBES - small dressing gowns

OBESITY - city of Obe

PACEMAKER - winner of Nobel Peace Prize

PULSE - grain

PUS - small cat

RED BLOOD COUNT - Dracula

RUPTURE - ecstasy

SECRETION - hiding anything

SUBCUTANEOUS - not cute enough

SUTURE - Gujarati for "what do you want"

TABLET - small table

TUMOR - extra pair

ULTRASOUND - radical noise

Same Work

A mechanic was removing a cylinder head from the motor of a Harley, when he spotted a world-famous heart surgeon in his shop. The heart surgeon was waiting for the service manager to come take a look at his bike. The mechanic shouted across the garage, "Hey Doc can I ask you a question?"

The famous surgeon, a bit surprised, walked over to the mechanic working on the motorcycle.

The mechanic straightened up, wiped his hands on a rag and asked, "So Doc, look at this engine. I also can open hearts, take valves out, fix'em, put in new parts and when I finish this will work just like a new one. So how come I get a pittance and you get the really big money, when you and I are doing basically the same work?"

The surgeon paused, smiled and leaned over, and whispered to the mechanic.....

"Try doing it with the engine running!"

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