* Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?
* Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed?
* Why don't you ever see the headline! "Psychic Wins Lottery"?
* Why is "abbreviated" such a long word?
* Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"?
* Why is it that to stop Windows 98/XP, you have to click on "Start"?
* Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?
* Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
* Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?
* Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?
* When dog food is new and improved tasting, who tests it?
* Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?
* Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?
* Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?
* If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?
More Funny Jokes
Three ants are standing in a row.
* The first ant says two ants are standing behind me.
* The second ant says one is in front of me and one is behind me.
* The third ant says two are standing in front of me and two are standing behind me.
How is it possible?
A:) The third ant is a liar!!
Girlfriend : And are you sure you love me and no one else?
Boyfriend : Sure! I checked the whole list again yesterday.
Teacher : Sam, you talk a lot.
Sam : It's a family tradition.
Teacher : What do you mean?
Sam : Sir, my grandpa was a lawyer, my father is a teacher.
Teacher : What about your mother?
Sam : She's a woman.
Tom: How should I convey the news to my father that I've failed?
David : You just send a telegram : Result declared, past year's performance repeated.
Teacher : George Washington not only chopped down his father's Cherry tree, but also admitted doing it. Now do you know why his father didn't punish him ?
Student : Because George still had the axe in his hand.
The little boy was sitting on a park bench munching on one chocolate bar after another. After the 6th one a man on the bench across from him said, 'Son, you know eating all those chocolates isn't good for you. It will give you acne, rot your teeth, make you fat.'
The boy replied, 'My grandfather lived to be 107 years old.'
The man asked, 'Did your grandfather eat 6 chocolate bars at a time?'
The little boy answered, 'No, he minded his own damn business!'