Water in the Carburetor
Wife: "There's trouble with the car. It has ."
Husband: "Water in the carburetor? That's ridiculous."
Wife: "I tell you the car has water in the carburetor."
Husband: "You don't even know what a carburetor is. I'll check it out. Where's the car?"
Wife: "In the pool."
More Stupid Jokes
A mother and daughter were doing dishes while the father and son were watching TV in the living room.
Suddenly, there was a loud crash of breaking plates, then complete silence. The son turned to look at his father.
Son : It's mummy!
Father : How do you know?
Son : She didn't say anything.
A Single Woman's bedtime prayer.....
Now I lay me down to sleep,
I pray for a man, who's not a creep.
One Who's handsome, smart and strong.
He's not afraid to admit when he is wrong.
One who thinks before he speaks.
When he promises to call, he dosen't wait 6 weeks.
I pray that he is gainfully employed,
Won't lose his cool when he's annoyed.
Pulls out my chair & opens my door,
MAssages my back & begs to do more.
Oh! Send me a man who will make love to my mind,
Knows what to say when I ask "How fat is my behind?"
One who'll make love till my body's itchin
He brings ME a sandwich too, when he goes to the kitchen.
I pray that this man will love me to no end,
And would never compare me with my best friend.
Thank You in advance and nowI'll just wait,
for I know You will send him before it's too late.
A middle-aged guy says to his wife, "You should go bra-less."
She says, "Do you think my breasts are still perky enough?" He says, "No, but maybe it'd pull the wrinkles out of your face."