Talk to Me

The man approached the very beautiful woman in the large supermarket and asked, "You know, I've lost my wife here in the supermarket. Can you talk to me for a couple of minutes?"


"Because every time I talk to a a beautiful woman my wife appears out of nowhere."

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Are You Hurt

While at the fairgrounds, a woman wanted to take a ride on the Ferris wheel before heading home. Her husband waited while she took a spin. The wheel went round and round and suddenly the woman was thrown out. She landed in a heap at her husband's feet.

He gasped and bent down. "Are you hurt?" he asked.

"Of course I'm hurt!" she replied. "Three times around and you didn't wave once."

Pack up

A man rushes into his house and yells to his wife, "Martha, pack up your things! I just won the state lottery!"

Martha replies, "Should I pack for warm weather or cold?"

The man says, "I don't care. Just as long as you're out of the house by noon."


An English professor wrote the words, "Woman without her man is nothing" on the blackboard and directed the students to punctuate it correctly.

The men wrote: "Woman, without her man, is nothing." The women wrote: "Woman! Without her, man is nothing."

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