Face or Body

Face or Body

Jasmeet : "What do you like most in me: my pretty face or my body?"
Santa : looking at her from head to toe and replied: "I like your sense of Humor.

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Nano Effect

Michael, Francis and Banta are standing at the Gates of Heaven being interviewed by St. Peter.

"Ok you, Michael, how many times did you cheat on your wife??

Let me be honest Peter. I've been seeing at least two or three different women a year all my married life?.

"Ok, your car in heaven is that Hyundai Santro there. Goodbye."

St. Peter turns to Francis, "How many times did you cheat on your wife?"

Francis replies, "I must admit that in fifteen years of marriage I did cheat on my wife twice."

St. Peter says, "OK, your car in heaven is that Honda Civic. Here are the keys. Get going!"

He then looks at Banta, "And you, how many times did you cheat on your wife?"

Banta lifts his head high and replies, "I am proud to say that in over twenty years of marriage, I never cheated on my wife. In fact, my beloved has been dead for two years now and I remained celibate the whole time!"

St Peter replies, "Very impressive... Your car in heaven is that BMW Z4-M Roadster convertible, Goodbye!?

Michael and Francis have driven off and are in a car park nearby waiting for their friend. Banta turns up in his BMW but he is crying his heart out.

Michael asks, Arrre! What's the matter with you? We should be crying. We're stuck with these cheaper models and you got an expensive BMW!"

Between sobs Banta explains, "I just saw my wife driving a Nano!"

Moving Computers

Santa and Banta work in a software company. One day, they were to move their computers to another building.

Santa was having a tough time carrying his machine.

Santa: "My machine has 500 MB disk. See how easily I am carrying it. Yours has just 250 MB. Can't you carry even this much?"

Banta: "But yours is empty and my disk is full!?

A For Apple

Banta class mein - Madam maine "abc" yaad karli.
Madam - Ok , to sunao.
Banta - abcdefghijklemnopqrstuvwxyz?
Madam - Arre aise nahi ?. Aise sunao A for apple.

Banta - Ok madam?.

A for apple.
B for bada apple.
C for chhota apple.
D for dusra apple.
E for ek aur apple.
F for fokat ka apple.
G for gol apple.
H for hazar apple
I for itney saarey apple?
J for jaao nahi khaani hai apple
K for kaise nahi khaayengey apple
L for lena padhega tumko apple
M for mujhe nahi chahiye itne apple
N for naa nahi kehtey kyunkey yeh hai apple
O for Oh to tumne khaa daale yeh saare apple
P for peth bhar khaao apple
Q for qismat mein nahi hoti hai sabke, yeh apple
R for roz agar khaao tum apple
S for sehetmand rahoge khaaogey agar tum apple
T for tumko nahi milengey itney achey apple
U for udhaar kii nahi hai yeh apple
V for very tasty hai yeh apple
W for waste na karo time aur khaalo jaldi se apple
X for X'mas mei bhii Hi! khana padenge apple
Y for yun na chehra phero dekhkey apple
Z for zaraasa aur khaalo apple

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