It's a Bird

One day Jagan Nath comes home from work extremely tired. He pours himself a few shots of whiskey, undoes his trousers, and sinks into his favorite sexual fantasy. His 5 year old daughter; Guddi, comes up to him and grabbing his member asks him "Papa papa yeh kya hai"

Jagan is in no mood for all this and quickly answers " bete, chidia hai " (it's a bird)

Saying this He shifts back to his 'Fantasy'.

The real world awaits Jagan when he comes to, he is in a cast upto his chest. There is an oxygen tent around his face. He is being given a blood transfusion. Basically, it seems as though he is on the critical list. After showing some signs of life, the Nurse removes his oxygen mask. Jagan begins to mumble.

Jagan: "mai kahan hoon, aur yeh sab kaise hua "? (Where am I, and what happend to me)?

Doctor: "aap hospital mein hain, aur jab humne aap ko es haal mein paya, wahaan aapke bacchi majood thi. Usko sab maloom hoga "

Jagan: "Munni beta kya hua tha papa ko batao"

Munni: "Pappa pappa, hum chidia ke saath khel reha thai na accanak se chidiya ne humpe thook diya!

.......Humko bada gussa aaya, humne chidia ke gardan marodh de, ande todh deye, aur ghonsle mein aag laga de.

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Durable Condoms

An Indian Chief sent his second in command down to the nearby paleface town to buy a pack of condoms. His ADC goes into the drugstore and tells the chemist "How! Um big chief need heap big Rubber!" The chemist gives him a pack of condoms and sends him on his way. The next day, the Indian comes back and throws what's left of the pack of condoms on the counter, complaining. "Um rubbers no good! Chief do Ooh-Ahh and rubber goes boom!"

The chemist hands him another pack of condoms, assures him that they would be more durable and sends him on his way! The next day, the Indian comes back, throws the remnants of the pack of condoms on the counter, and says "These no good! Um chief do Ooh-Aah, and they go boom!"

The chemist, who's patience was beginning to wear, pacifies they Indian, retreats to the rear of his store and wraps an the barrel of a double barrel rifle with a condom. He returns with the new high-durability condom to the Indian and says "Here, take this! Your chief can never make this go Boom!"

The next day, the Indian returns, looking very dejected! "Um rubber too good!", he says. "Um chief do Ooh-Ahh and his balls go BOOM!"

Miss the Shot

In olden days, once upon a time when Guru Dron was teaching his shishsyas, under the pepal tree.

Guru Dron: Arjun can you see the parrot in the midst of the leaves of the tree.
Arjun: Ji Guru ji.

Guru Dron: Us ki aankhpar nishana lagao.
Arjun: Ji Guru ji.

But Arjun misses the shot.
And Arjun cried in anger: "Maa ki chut nishana gaya chuuk".

Upon this Guru Dron said to Arjun: Agar tumne yeh phir se bola tou ek teer aasman se aa kar tumhari Gand me ghuss jayega.

Arjun: maaf karna guru ji.

Again Arjun misses the shot and again he said: "Maa ki chut nishana gaya chuuk".

Upon this guru Dron was very angry and said: Agar tumne yeh phir se bola tou ab zaroor ek teer aakar tumhari gand me ghuss jayega.

But again arjun misses the shot and again cried: "Maa ki chut nishana gaya chuuk".

After this statement of Arjun:

Ek teer Guru Dron ki gand me aakar ghuss jata hai.

Guru Dron said looking at the sky: yeh teer tou Arjun ki gand me ghussna chahiya tha.


2 minute maza

Once a young guy was basking at the beach, and inside his cock their were two sperms were fighting with each other ...

One said,"i'm future President of this country".

Second exploded,"hah!what President...i'm future PM of this country. President is only for name sake...."

As fight was on...a really sexy blonde ..with top less passed by... and that poor chap hedid'nt had any options....he masturbated.

Both sperms cameout in jiffy. very dejected and dissappointed....

One of them said, "sale ne, do minute ke maaje ke liya career chaupat kar diya".

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