See The Guts!
On a ship, the Project managers of three different companies belonging to 3 different nations were traveling with their Trainee guys.
They started an argument on whose Trainee engineer had more guts. The American PM called for one of his man and told him to jump off and take a round swimming around the moving ship.
The Trainee did as he was commanded. The American PM boasted of by saying, "See the guts!"
Now the German PM called out for one of his man and asked him to take two similar rounds around the moving ship.
The Trainee did as he was told. When he came back from the water the German PM said, "See the guts!"
Now the Indian PM called out for his most courageous man and asked him to take five similar rounds.
The Trainee promptly replied, " Why the hell should I ???"
The PM proudly said, "See the guts!"
More Office Jokes
Tom is applying for a job as a signalman for the local railroad and is told to meet the inspector at the signal box.
The inspector decides to give Tom a pop quiz, asking: "What would you do if you realized that two trains were heading towards each other on the same track?"
Tom says: "I would switch one train to another track."
"What if the lever broke?" asks the inspector.
"Then I'd run down to the tracks and use the manual lever down there", answers Tom.
"What if that had been struck by lightning?" challenges the inspector.
"Then," Tom continued, "I'd run back up here and use the phone to call the next signal box."
"What if the phone was busy?"
"In that case," Tom argued, "I'd run to the street level and use the public phone near the station".
"What if that had been vandalized?"
"Oh well," said Tom, "in that case I would run into town and get my Uncle Leo".
This puzzled the inspector, so he asked, "Why would you do that?"
"Because he's never seen a train crash."
A disappointed salesman of Coca Cola returns from his Middle East assignment. A friend asked, "Why weren't you successful with the Arabs?"
The salesman explained, "When I got posted in the Middle East, I was very confident that I will makes a good sales pitch as Cola is virtually unknown there. But, I had a problem I didn't know to speak Arabic. So, I planned to convey the message through 3 posters...
First poster, a man crawling through the hot desert sand... totally exhausted and panting.
Second, the man is drinking our Cola and
Third, our man is now totally refreshed.
Then these posters were pasted all over the place"
"That should have worked," said the friend.
The salesman replied, "Well, not only did I not speak Arabic, I also didn't realize that Arabs read from right to left..."
A young businessman had just started his own firm. He rented a beautiful office and had it furnished with antiques.
Sitting there, he saw a man come into the outer office. Wishing to appear the hot shot, the businessman picked up the phone and started to pretend he had a big deal working.
He threw huge figures around and made giant commitments. Finally he hung up and asked the visitor, "Can I help you?"
The man said, "Yeah, I've come to activate your phone lines."