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Profession

Profession

Three friends boarded a housefull bus. Some how they sneaked their way in the centre of the bus. They stopped besides a seat which was occupied by three girls.

The girls offered them seat on one condition..that they (girls) will seat on their (men) laps after having the seat. The men agreed to the condition and had the seat and the girls on their lap as well.

After some time one girl said to the man on whose lap she was sitting, "Are you an electrical engineer?". The man was surprised and replied "yes but how did you know that."

The girl replied "I am receiving shocks from your solder gun".

After some time another girl asked to the man on whose lap she was sitting, "Are you a mechanical engineer." The man was also surprised and replied "yes but how did you know that."

On that the girl replied "your piston is hurting my cylinder."

After some time the third girl asked her man if he was a civil engineer. The man was also surprised and asked her how she knew that.

The girl replied "Your dam has broken and flooded my village."




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Potential and reality

A son asked his father: "Dad, what's the difference between potential and reality ?" (a question he was asked at school)

His father replied: "Go ask your mother if she would sleep with the milkman for a million bucks."

The son did this and returned that his mother would sleep with the milkman for a million bucks.

His father said: "Now go ask your sister if she would sleep with the milkman for a million dollars." The son did this and later replied: "Sis said that she too would sleep with the milkman for a million bucks."

His father then said: "Go ask your brother if he would sleep with the milkman for a million bucks."

The son getting rather irritated did this. He returned and said: "Ivor also said that he would sleep with the milkman for a million bucks.

I am getting tired of asking people if they will sleep with the milkman. Please tell me what's the difference between potential and reality?"

His father looked at him and said: "This family has the potential to make $3,000,000, but the reality is that we have two sluts and a homo in the family."

Breasts - some descriptions

(o)(o) perfect breasts
( + )( + ) fake silicone breasts
(*)(*) high nipple breasts
(@)(@) big nipple breasts
oo a cups
{ O }{ O } d cups
(oYo) wonder bra breasts
( ^^)( ^^) cold breasts
(o)(O) lopsided breasts
(Q)(O) pierced breasts
(p)(p) hanging tassels breasts
o/o/ Grandma's breasts
( - )( - ) flat against the shower door breasts
< o>< o> electric shock breasts
|o||o| android breasts

(/)(o) scratched breasts (ouch)
(%)(o) extra nipple breasts (like Chandler)

Promotion

The male sexual organ requests a promotion and a raise for the following reasons.

- has to work hard;
- has to work at great depths;
- has to work upside down;
- has no ventilation or air conditioned environment at work;
- has to work in a high humidity environment;
- has to work at high temperatures;
- does not get weekends and holidays off;
- does not get time off after extra hours of work;
- has a hazardous work environment that often causes professional sickness.

Request denied for the following reasons:

- does not work 8 hours in a row;
- does not answer immediately to all requests;
- does not have a degree;
- after a short activity period, falls asleep at work;
- shows no fidelity to the workplace;
- retires too early;
- does not work at all unless pushed from behind;
- does not leave the workplace clean after finishing work.

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