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Laugh and Cry

Laugh and Cry

A guy walked into a bar one day and noticed a jar full of money on the counter. He asked the bartender what it was for and the bartender replied that if he could go into the back and make the donkey laugh, he could have that jar of money. So the guy walks in the back and a few minutes he comes out with the donkey laughing his head off. He gets his money and walks out.The next day the same guy went to the same bar and noticed another jar of money sittin on the counter. The bartender, when asked, said that if he could go in the back and make the donkey cry, he could have that jar of money. So the guy goes in the back and about 5 minutes later comes out with the donkey crying huge tears. As the guy was about to leave, the bartender stopped him and asked him how he made the donkey laugh and cry. The guy replied: The first time I told him I had a bigger dick then he did, and the second time I proved it.




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Their Hookers

A woman and her son were taking a cab in New York City. It was raining and all the hookers were standing under the awnings. "Mommy," said the little boy, "what are all those ladies doing?" "They're waiting for their husbands to get off of work," she replied. The cabbie turns around and says, "Geez lady, why don't you tell him the truth? Their hookers. They have sex with men for money. "The little boy's eyes get wide and he says, "Is that true, mommy?" His mother, glaring at the cabbie, answers in the affirmative. After a few minutes, the kid asks, "Mommy what happens to the babies those ladies have?" "They mostly become cab drivers," she replied.

With My Teacher

Kid comes home from school and his mother asks him, "How was school son?" He replies, "It wasn't good at all Mom, I had sex with my teacher." She blows up and tells him to go imediately to his room. His father gets home and walks into his room to find he is looking at some porno mags and says to his son, "You had sex with your teacher son?" Kid replies, "Yeah it wasn't good." The father says well your only 14 years old and you have done a good job, well go tomorrow and get that new bike you have always wanted. They get there the next day and get it bought. Then the father asks him, "Do you want to ride it home or just put it in the back of the truck? "The kid replies, "I better just put it in the back of the truck." They get into the truck and the father asks his son, "So why didn't you wanna ride it home?" The son tells him, "Because Mr. Green got me in the butt pretty hard yesterday."

Twinkies

One day a young boy finds a condom on the floor. He brings is to his father and asks what is it. His father replies,"Oh, that's a twinkie. Son if you find anymore bring them to me and I'll give you a quarter.The next week the little boy returned to his mother's house with a lot of quarters. His mother asks, "Where did you get all those quarters?" The little boy answered, "Daddy gave them to me for finding twinkies for him. But what he doesn't know is, before I gave Daddy the twinkies, I sucked all the cream filling out.

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