A beautiful young girl is about to undergo an operation. She's laid into a trolley and wheeled into the corridor. The nurse leaves her outside the operating theater and goes to tell the surgeon she's ready. A young man in a white coat comes over, lifts up the girl's sheet and examines her naked body. He walks away and talks to another man in a white coat. The second man comes over and performs the same examination. Then a third man comes over and lifts the sheet. The girl loses her temper, 'Are these examinations strictly necessary?' she complains. 'I've no idea,' replies the man. 'We're just here to paint the ceiling.'
A surgical patient wakes up after an operation and is told that he's got to be opened up again. It seems that the surgical team has left a pair of rubber gloves inside him. The patient says, 'Couldn't I just pay for them?'
More Medical Jokes
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A doctor was having an affair with his nurse. Shortly afterward, she told him that she was pregnant. Not wanting his wife to know, he gave the nurse a sum of money and asked her to go to Italy and have the baby there.
"But how will I let you know the baby is born?" she asked.
He replied, "Just send me a postcard and write "spaghetti" on the back. I'll take care of expenses." Not knowing what else to do, the nurse took the money and flew to Italy.
Six months went by, and then one day the doctor's wife called him at the office and said, "Dear, you received a very strange postcard in the mail today from Europe, and I don't understand what it means."
The doctor said, "Just wait until I get home and I will explain it to you."
Later that evening the doctor came home, read the postcard, and fell to the floor with a heart attack. Paramedics rushed him to the hospital emergency room. The head medic stayed back to comfort the wife. He asked what trauma had precipitated the cardiac arrest.
So the wife picked up the card and read: "Spaghetti, Spaghetti, Spaghetti, Spaghetti - Two with sausage and meatballs; two without."