Poppat and Donkey

Poppat and Donkey

Having lost his donkey, Poppat got down to his knees and started thanking God.
His friend Mungeri asked, "Your donkey is missing; what are you thanking God for?"
Poppat replied "I am thanking God for seeing to it that I wasn't riding the donkey at that time, otherwise I would have been missing too !!"

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Q: How do you get the water into the Watermelon?
A: Plant it in the spring.

Q: Why was the boy covered in gift wrap?
A: His mom told him to "live in the present."

Q: What does a piece of fruit sleep on?
A: Apri-Cots.

Strange Beggar

Two beggars are sitting side by side on a street in Rome.

One has a cross in front of him; the other one the Star of David.

Many people go by and look at both beggars, but only put money into the hat of the beggar sitting behind the cross. A priest comes by, stops and watches throngs of people giving money to the beggar behind the cross, but none give to the beggar behind the Star of David.

Finally, the priest goes over to the beggar behind the Star of David and says, "My poor fellow, don't you understand?? This is a Catholic country, this city is the seed of Catholicism. People aren't going to give you money if you sit there with a Star of David in front of you, especially when you're sitting beside a beggar who has a cross. In fact, they would probably give to him just out of spite."

The beggar behind the 'Star of David' listened to the priest, turned to the other beggar with the cross and said: "Moishe, look who's trying to teach the Goldstein brothers about marketing."

The Chief

A tribe in the jungle consider farting after every meal to be a sign of power, however the chief of the tribe finds it extremely difficult to fart.

His servant goes to the doctor and say "big chief, no fart" so the doctor gives him a pill, the next day the servant goes back to the doctor and says "big chief, still no fart" so the doctor gives him a big pill the size of his hand.

On the third day the servant goes back and says "big cheif still not fart" so the doctor gives a pill the size of a football.

The next day the servant comes back and says to the doctor "Big fart, no chief!"

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