Types of Animals
There was this teacher who was teaching young kids the different types of animals, she showed them the picture of a giraffe, and asked them what it was. Nobody answered..so she gave them a clue, 'It has a long neck.' One kid answered, "Giraffe!" Pleased, the teacher showed a picture of a zebra. Nobody answered it again, so she gave them a clue. 'This animal has stripes.' "Zebra!" one kid answered. So she put up another one, that of a deer. The teacher could not think of a clue..but suddenly she came up with one!..she asked them 'what does your mother call your father?' Suddenly one child got up and answered 'HORNY BASTARD!'
More Marriage Jokes
Mary Clancy goes up to Father O' Grady after his Sunday morning service, and she's in tears.
He says, " So what's bothering you, Mary my dear?"
She says, "Oh, Father, I've got terrible news . My husband passed away last night."
The priest says, "Oh, Mary, that's terrible. Tell me, Mary, did he have any last requests?"
She says, "That he did, Father."
The priest says, "What did he ask, Mary? "
She says, He said, 'Please Mary, put down that damn gun...'
Biwi : Jab tum desi pite ho to Paro kahte ho, Jab vilayati pite ho to darling kahte ho, Aaj kya pee kar aaye ho ki 'Chudel' kahte ho?
Pati : Aaj main hosh mein hoon.
Doctot sahib mujhe bahut lamba jeena chahta hoon, kya aapke paas koi upaay hai.
Doc: Shadi kar lo.
Shadi karne se lamba jioonga?