A beautiful, voluptuous woman went to a gynecologist. The doctor took one look at her and all his professionalism went out the window. He immediately told her to undress. After she had disrobed, the doctor began to stroke her thigh. Doing so, he asked her, "Do you know what I'm doing?" "Yes," she replied, "you're checking for any abrasions or dermatological abnormalities." "That is right," said the doctor. He then began to fondle her breasts. "Do you know what I'm doing now?" "Yes," the woman said, "you're checking for any lumps or breast cancer." "Correct," replied the shady doctor. Finally, he mounted his patient and started having sexual intercourse with her. He asked, "Do you know what I'm doing now?" "Yes," she said. "You're getting herpes, which is why I came here in the first place."
Young Girl after her Honeymoon
A young girl after her honeymoon came fully exhausted and tired.
When her friends asked her what happened?
She replied : When this 70 year old bastard told me he has saved a lot from last 50 years, "I thought It was MONEY"
More Sexy Jokes
One day, while walking to the store, I passed by a Nursing Home. On the front lawn were 6 old ladies laying naked on the grass. I thought this was a bit unusual, but continued on my way to the store. On my return trip, I passed the same Nursing Home with the same 6 old ladies laying naked on the lawn. This time my curiosity got the best of me and I went inside to talk to the manager. "Do you know there are 6 ladies laying naked on your front lawn?" Yes," he said. "They are retired prostitutes and they're having a yard sale."
Two guys are walking on the beach. One guy says to the other Hey your son peed his name in the sand. The other guy says so whats wrong with that lots of kids do that. He said yeah your right but its in my daughter's hand writing.