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Fight is about to start

Fight is about to start

Santa: Hurry-up, hurry-up, give me a drink. Fight is about to start.
Bartender gives him a drink.
Santa again says: Hurry-up, hurry-up, give me drink. Fight is about to start.
Bartender again gives him a drink.
Santa again asks for a drink as the fight is about to star.
Bartender: When on earth the fight will start?
Naughty Santa: When you will ask for money.




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Accidents due to drunken driving

10% of road accidents are due to drunken driving.

Which makes it a logical statement that 90% of accidents are due to driving without drinking!

Lecture on ill effects of drinking

Police arrested a drunkard & askd: Where r u going?
Man: I'm going 2 attend a lecture on ill effects of drinking.
Cop: Who'll lecture at midnight ?
Man: My wife...

You are the reason...

A guy, sitting outside his home about to be evicted from his house, was contemplating how the future would be after he had divorced his wife, lost his children and lost his job...

He notices a crate of beer bottles and walks up to it.

He takes out an empty bottle, smashing it into the concrete wall swearing, "You are the reason I don't have a wife", second bottle, "You are the reason I don't have my children", third bottle "You are the reason I lost my job".

He notices the fourth bottle is sealed and still full of beer. He takes the bottle, puts it aside and says "Stand aside my dear friend; I know you were not involved".

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