Froggy Business

Froggy Business

A beautiful, well-endowed, young blonde goes to her local pet store in search of an exotic pet. As she looks about the store, she notices a box full of frogs. The sign on the box says: "Oral Sex" Frogs! Only $20 each! Money Back Guarantee (Comes with complete instructions).

The girl excitedly looks around to see if anybody's watching her and whispers softly to the man behind the counter, "I'll take one." The man packaged the frog and said, "Just follow the instructions carefully." The girl nods, grabs the box, and is quickly on her way home.

As soon as she closes the door to her apartment, the girl takes out the instructions and reads them thoroughly, doing exactly what it says to do.

1. Take a shower.
2. Splash on some nice smelling perfume.
3. Slip into on a very sexy teddy.
4. Crawl into bed spread your legs and put the frog down "there".

She then quickly gets into bed, puts the frog between her legs and ... to her surprise, nothing happens! The girl is totally frustrated and quite upset at this point. She rereads the instructions and notices at the bottom of the paper it says, "If you have any problems or questions please call the pet store."

So, the girl calls the pet store. The man says, "I had some complaints earlier today. I'll be right over." Within five minutes, the man is ringing her doorbell.

The girl welcomes him in and says, "See, I've done everything according to the instructions and the damn thing just sits there." The man, looking very concerned, picks up the frog, stares directly into its eyes and sternly says: "Listen to me! I'm only going to show you how to do this one more time!"

More Sexy Jokes

Mad Cow disease

A Television Program Organizer (Lady) went to make an Interview with a farmer seeking the main reason that caused Cow Madness (Mad Cow disease).

The Lady : Good evening Sir, we are here to collect information about the reason that causes Cow Madness. Do you have any idea what might be the reason??

The Farmer, stared at the lady and said, "Do you know that the Bull fucks the cow once a year?

The Lady getting embarrassed: "Well sir, that's a new piece of information, but what's the relation between this phenomena and Cow Madness?

The Farmer : Well Mam, do you know that we milk the Cow FOUR times a day!!!

The Lady : Sir this is really valuable information, but what about getting to the point!

The Farmer : I am getting to the point Mam. Just imagine, if I am playing with your Tits FOUR TIMES A DAY and FUCKING YOU ONCE A YEAR, won't you get Mad??

Shooting Bird

There was a Chinese father who was very close to his son. They used to go everywhere together including looking for "chicken" (Chinese slang for prostitute).

One day, the son decided to go overseas for study. The father was very supportive, and before his son left, the father told him, "We cannot look for chicken together for the next few years. However, if you need to look for chicken, please go ahead and I will pay for it.

But please state the expense as 'Shooting Bird' so that your mother will not suspect."

So the son left, and after a month, the father received the bill from the son......(shooting bird - $500). Subsequently, and for the next few months, the bill for shooting bird is more than $1000.

Well, the father could not tolerate this, so he wrote to his son. "Son, you have been shooting too expensive bird, try some cheaper one."

A month later, the father received another bill from his son. On it he had written:

Shooting Bird - $50
Rifle Repair - $2,000

Condom Factory

A guy is going on a tour of a factory that produces various latex products. At the first stop, he is shown the machine that manufactures baby-bottle nipples. The machine makes a loud "hiss-pop" noise. "The hiss is the rubber being injected into the mold," explains the guide. "The popping sound is the needle poking a hole in the end of the nipple."

Later, the tour reaches the part of the factory where condoms are manufactured. The machine makes a "Hiss. Hiss. Hiss. Hiss-pop" noise. "Wait a minute!" says the man taking the tour. "I understand what the 'hiss, hiss,' is, but what's that 'pop' every so often?"

"Oh, it's just the same as in the baby-bottle nipple machine," says the guide. It pokes a hole in every fourth condom."

"Well, that can't be good for the condoms!"

"Yeah, but it's great for the baby-bottle nipple business!"

Show More Sexy Jokes