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Toys and Breasts

Toys and Breasts

Q:) What is common between Toys and Breasts.

A:) Both are made for children but fathers play with it!




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Brown thing

This girl goes to a doctor and say doctor Its very embarrassing but something brown is dropping off my private parts.

The doctor asks the girl to lift her skirt and examines her and sure there is some thing brown coming out.

The doctor is confused ask's the girl, How frequently are you having sex?

Doc: One a day?
Girl: Naa

Doc: Once a Week?
Girl: Nope

Doc: Once a month?
Girl: Naaa

Doc: One a year!
Girl: Some thing like that.

Doc: Oh I get it, it's nothing the brown thing is just rust!

Psalm 129

A priest was driving along and saw nun on the side of the road he stopped and offered her a lift which she accepted. She got in and crossed her legs, forcing the habit to open and reveal a leg.

The Priest looks and nearly has an accident, and after changing gear lets his hand slide up her leg.

She immediately says "Father remember psalm 129" The priest apologizes Profusely and removes his hand but is unable to remove his eyes from her leg.

Further on when he changes gear and has oggled at her leg for the Zillionth time he lets the hand slide up the leg again. The Nun once Again says "Father remember psalm 129" Once again the priest apologizes.

"Sorry sister but you know the flesh is weak" Arriving at the convent The nun gets out and the priest goes on his way. Once he arrives at his Church he rushes to the bible and looks up psalm 129 it said "GO FORTH AND SEEK, FURTHER UP YOU WILL FIND GLORY"

MORAL OF THE STORY IN YOUR JOB YOU SHOULD ALWAYS BE WELL INFORMED OR YOU MIGHT MISS A GREAT OPPURTUNITY.

Little Johnny

There was this 5-year-old boy named Johnny, and he was very wise in the ways of the world. His problem was that he was a compulsive gambler and couldn't resist making all these outrageous wagers.

"Hey Dad! Behind that pine tree you'll see two squirrels doing it!"

The father was understandably shocked. "Son, how could you say such things?
There are no squirrels doing anything."

"Hey Dad, I just speak the facts. If I win, you pay me 5 dollars, if I lose, I pay you 10 dollars. That is a very reasonable offer."

The father agrees to the wager. They walk over to the pine tree, and sure enough two squirrels are coupling. So the father forks over the five dollars as he
promised.

It so happened that September was just around the corner, and Little Johnny had to start kindergarten. Needless to say, the father did not want Johnny making his wagers with other innocent children. So he calls the kindergarten teacher to
warn her of his son.

"Err... Ms. Smith, I want to tell you that my son Johnny is prone to make explicit sexual remarks and even wager money on such. Could you please disabuse him of such a filthy habit by any means necessary?"

The teacher says she will try.

So the first day of class starts. Not even five minutes pass on the first day when Little Johnny pipes up. "Hey Ms. Smith! I will bet 50 dollars that you have brown pubic hair!"

Obviously the teacher was flabberghasted by Little Johnny's remarks. She grabs his ear and hauls him to a side room. "I oughta spank you and wash out your mouth with a bar of Lava soap, you filthy little boy!"

Little Johnny took this all in stride. "Hey Ms. Smith, I just speak the facts. If I win, you don't owe me anything. If you win, I will pay you fifty dollars."

Little Johnny even pulls out the wad of bills to show the teacher he is not bluffing.

Now Ms. Smith has blonde pubic hair and she is a severely underpaid kindergarten teacher. Besides, the father did request that she put an end to his wagers. What more appropriate way to end them than to prove him wrong for once in his life? So she peeks out the door to make sure nobody is at the door. She then locks the door and doffs her drawers
in front of Little Johnny. Sure enough he can see that her pubic hair is blonde. Downcast he begrudgingly forks over the wad of money he bet.

"Now Johnny, I trust that you will never make any bets ever again."

Now Ms. Smith is quite proud of her little victory (and making a little change on the side). She calls up the father to tell of her success. "I am pleased to report that your son will never be wagering again." The father is quite curious as to how she did it.

"Well, err... You did say use any means necessary. Johnny bet me that I had brown pubic hair and, well... err... I proved him wrong."

"Just how did you prove Johnny wrong?!"

"Well, uhhh... I took Johnny into a side room and I showed him my genitalia." Ms. Smith was quite nervous at this point.

"That goddamn son-of-a-bitch! He bet me 100 dollars that you'd take your underwear off on the first day of class!"

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