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One Liners

One Liners

A cardiologist marries a gynaecologist and were blessed with twin girls. Guess what they name them - Angina and Vagina.

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A prostitute goes to deposit a $100 bill in a bank. The teller says, "Sorry, madam, the note is fake".
"Oh no!" exclaimed the prostitute, "I have been raped".

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Secretary said publicly that you have a small penis, would you comment on this?
"The truth is that she has a big mouth".


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A Japanese girl accidentally lets out a big fart after making love. She said, "Aww, so sorry... exkooz me pleazo, Front hole so happy back hole laugh out loud".


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Sex is like a card game. If you don't have a good partner, you better have a good hand.


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Dracula asked God, "May I be reincarnated as a white angel with wings and still suck blood?"
God said, "Okay, I will turn you into a sanitary pad".




More Sexy Jokes

Pan cake

A young couple took their five-year-old son to the doctor. With some hesitation, they explained that, although their little angel appeared to be in good health, they were concerned about his rather small penis.

After examining the child, the doctor confidently declared, "Just feed him pancakes. That should solve the problem."

The next morning, when the boy arrived at breakfast, there was a large stack of warm pancakes in the middle of the table. "Gee, mom," he exclaimed.

"For me?"

"Just take two," his mother replied. "The rest are for your father."

Love & Sex

Love is a complicated machinery. But sometimes all you need is a good screw to fix it.

Sex is like a card game. If you don't have a good partner, you better have a good hand.

Why is the blow job a win/lose situation? You may have her on her knees, but she has you by the balls.

Why does the penis hate himself? He has a bald head with no brains, one blind eye, lives among nuts, an asshole is his neighbour and he is in love with pussy.

Notorious Fullforms

Capstan: Can a penis stands thrice a night?

[optimistic] W.D. & H.O.Wills.-- If wife desires & husband offers wills.

Goldflake: Generally old ladies desire fuck less & kiss excess.

Pepsi: Please enter penis straight inside.

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