LIFE

Love is a gamble,

sex is a trade,

boys do the fuckin,

gals get the blame,

5 minutes of pleasure,

9 months of pain,

1 night in hospital,

and JUNIOR needs the name.




More Sexy Jokes

Let Me Bite Your Breasts

A guy walking down the street sees a woman with perfect breasts. He says to her "Hey miss, would you let me bite your breasts for 100 dollars?" Are you nuts?", she replies. And keeps walking away. He turns around, runs around the block and gets to the corner before she does. "Would you let me bite your breasts for 1,000 dollars?" he asks again.

"Listen sir, I'm not that kind of woman. Got it?" So the guy runs again around the next block and faces her again: "Would let me bite your breasts for 10,000 dollars?" She thinks about it for a while and says "Hmmm 10,000 dollars eh? Ok, but not here. Let's go to that dark alley over there"

So they went to that alley and she takes off the blouse to reveal the most perfect breasts in the world. As soon as he sees them he jumps on them and start caressing them, fondling them, kissing them, licking them, burying his face in them... but no biting. In the end the woman gets all annoyed and asks: "Are you gonna bite them or what?" "Nah", he replies. "Too expensive."

Panties of 60's & 90's

Q:) What is the difference between panties of 60's and panties of 90's?

A:) In 60's you moved the panties to see the bum and In the 90's you have to spread the bums to see the panties.

Speech

An Englishman, a Scotsman, and an Irishman are all to give speaches to the Deaf Society. All are keen to make an impression on their audience.

The Englishman goes first and to the surprise of his colleagues starts by rubbing first his chest and then his groin. When he finishes the Scotsman and Irishman ask him what he was doing.

Well" he explained" By rubbing my chest I indicated breasts and thus Ladies and by rubbing my groin I indicated balls and thus Gentlemen. So my speech started Ladies and Gentlemen".

On his way up to the podium the Scotsman thought to himself I'll go one better than that English bastard and started his speech by making an antler symbol with his fingers above his head before also rubbing his chest and his groin.

When he finished his colleagues asked what he was doing. "Well" he explained" By imitating antlers and then rubbing my chest and groin I was starting my speech by saying Dear Ladies and Gentlemen".

On his way up to the podium the Irishman thought to himself I'll go one further than those mainland bastards and started his speech by making an antler symbol above his head, rubbing his chest, and then his groin, and then masturbating
furiously.

When he finished his colleagues asked him what he was doing. "Well" he explained," by imitating antlers, rubbing my chest and then my groin and then masturbating I was starting my speech by saying - Deer Ladies and Gentlemen, it gives me great pleasure......."

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