A young lady who thought she was overweight went to see a dietitian. She walked into his office and asked several questions about dieting, exercise, and other things. Her final question to the dietitian sparked interest in him. She asked, "How many calories are in sperm?"
"Why?" he replied.
She explained some of the things she liked to do.
After thinking a minute he said, "I really have no clue, but if you are consuming that much of it, then no guy is going to care if you are a little chunky!"
More Medical Jokes
The wife of an older man is distraught because her husband's 'little soldier' can't salute anymore. She goes to her local doctor and explains the situation and the doctor just feels plain bad for her.
The doctor thinks for a little bit, turns to the woman and says, "Listen, I don't do this for everyone, but since your husband's on his way out... Get this prescription, and put three drops in his milk before he goes to bed." The wife is very happy and thanks the doctor profusely.
Two weeks later, the doctor sees the woman and asks how it went. The lady blushes, smiles and says, "well I put thirty drops in his milk by accident, and well, we just need an antidose now to close the coffin."
A 95 years old man sucks his 90 years old wife after an hour sucking is wife chests he dies!
In the medical report "the death of this person coz of driking something after expiry date."
A man was suffering from impotence, so he went to see a specialist. The doctor gave him a prescription that he was to take faithfully three times a day, and always with food.
A couple of days later, the man was at a formal banquet and didn't want any of the other guests to spot and possibly identify his pink and purple capsule of medication. So, he instructed the waiter to empty the capsule into his soup, thinking he could eat his soup openly with everyone else, take his medication, and preserve his privacy all at the same time.
However, when the soup was served everyone received a bowl of it but the man, who began feeling conspicuous and angry. He confronted the waiter and asked why he hadn't been served his 'special' soup.
"Well, sir, I poured your medication into your bowl as instructed. Since then, I have been waiting for the noodles to lie down."