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Political Jokes

Political Jokes

Political Jokes or Political Humor or Politics Humor or Politics Jokes are usually a form of satire. These jokes are concerned with politicians and heads of state, but may also cover the absurdities of a country's political situation. Two large collection of political jokes exist. The first one makes fun of a negative attitude to political opponents or to politicians in general. The second one makes fun of political cliches, mottos, catch phrases or simply blunders of politicians. Some, especially the you have two cows genre, derive humour from comparing different political systems. We have a good collection of funny political jokes. These jokes are original and best in its category could be found on the web. Hope you will enjoy these jokes. You can e-mail these political jokes to your friends or someone you want. If you have your own political jokes please send your political jokes to us so that we will display your joke on our website.

Political Jokes
Ship Par Jinn
Ship Par Jinn

एक बार मोदी, राहुल और केजरीवाल शिप में बैठ के जा रहे थे,
अचानक एक जिन्न आया और बोला तुम लोग एक एक चीज समुद्र में फेंको अगर मैंने ढूढ़ लिया तो तुमको मार दूँगा, नहीं तो तुम्हारा गुलाम बन जाऊँगा ।

राहुल बाबा ने सुई फेंकी जिन्न ने 2 मिनट में ढूॅढ़ लिया और खलास कर दिया।

केजरीवाल ने अपना एक बाल तोडकर फेंका जिन्न ने उसे भी ढूढ़ लिया और केजरीवाल भी ख़तम।

मोदी ने भी कुछ फेंका जिन्न ने 30 मिनट ढूॅढा, बहुत ढूढा पर कुछ न मिला।

जिन्न ने कहा मेरे बाप मैं आपका गुलाम, फेका क्या था।

मोदी बोले - बेटे मैं तेरा बाप हूँ

"डिस्प्रिन " की गोली फेंकी थी ,
तेरे जैसे 10 भी मिलकर नहीं ढूढ़ पायेंगे ।

अब चल दिल्ली बहुत काम करना है देश का ।।

Neta JI Ki Car Ka Accident
Neta JI Ki Car Ka Accident

Neta ji gaanv mein sabha karne ja rahe the lekin gaanv se pehle hi unki car ke neeche ek kutta aa gaya.

Kutta mar gaya lekin car bhi accident ki wajah se kharab ho gayi

Neta ji ne driver ko madad laane ke liye gaanv mein bheja.

Thodi der baad jab driver lauta to uske gale mein dher saari malayein padi thi.

Neta ji ne poochha ki toone aisa kya kiya jo tera itna samman hua?

Maine to sirf itna kaha ki neta ji ki car ka accident ho gaua hai.....
Kutta mar gaya....

Citizens and Politicians
Citizens and Politicians

One day a florist went to a barber for a haircut.
After the cut, he asked about his bill, and the barber replied, 'I cannot accept money from you, I'm doing community service this week.

The florist was pleased and left the shop.

When the barber went to open his shop the next morning, there was a 'Thank You' card and a dozen roses waiting for him at his door.

Later, a grocer comes in for a haircut, and when he tries to pay his bill, the barber again replied, 'I cannot accept money from you , I'm doing community service this week.

The grocer was happy and left the shop.

The next morning when the barber went to open up, there was a 'Thank You' card and a bag of fresh vegetables waiting for him at his door.

Then a politician came in for a haircut, and when he went to pay his bill, the barber again replied, 'I cannot accept money from you. I'm doing community service this week.

The politician was very happy and left the shop.

The next morning, when the barber went to open up, there were a dozen politicians lined up waiting for a free haircut.

And that, my friends, illustrates the fundamental difference between the citizens of our country and the politicians who run it.

Height of Overconfidence
Height of Overconfidence

There was a meeting of Bihar state freedom fighters.

They wanted to free Bihar from India.

Ram bhaiya raised a point...,

"We may take Bihar from India but how will we develop it?"

Shayam bhaiya had a brainwave. "No problem!

We will attack America, we will lose the war and USA will take us over...

Then we will become a State of USA & develop automatically...!

We will also become direct citizens of USA. No more Visas & Green Cards."

All the Bhaiyas were overjoyed with this solution, but an old bhaiya was not.

Someone asked him why he wasn't happy.

The old bhaiya replied,

"That's all very well....,

"But what would happen if by chance we won & took over America?"

If Congress wins next election
If Congress wins next election

If Congress wins next loksabha election...

Chawal 1 rupey ke 2 Dane,
.
Dal 5 rupey ki 4 dane,
.
Oil 10 rupey ke 2 drops,
.
Doodh 2 rupey ka 1 qatra,
.
Chini 3 ruaey ki 5 dane
.
Bijli or aata milne ke chance 1% hain.
.
Note: Jo bhi ye sab cheezen ek sath khridega, Use asli desi ghi ki khushbu muft songhai jayegi aur petrol free dikhaya jayega.


Rahul Gandhi Ki Shaadi
Rahul Gandhi Ki Shaadi

Rahul Gandhi --> Mom, aapaki wajah se meri shaadi nahi ho paaa rahi.
Sonia Gandhi --> Kyun beta?
Rahul Gandhi --> Har taraf to likha hai ki sonia ko bahumat do.

Make more People Happy
Make more People Happy

George Bush, Dick Cheney and Donald Rumsfeld are flying on Air Force One.

The President looks at the Vice President, chuckles, and says,"You know, I could throw a $1,000 bill out the window right now and make somebody very happy."

The Vice President shrugs and says, "Well, I could throw 10 $100 bills out the window and make 10 people very happy."

Not to be outdone, the Secretary of Defense says, "Of course, then, I could throw 100 $10 bills out the window and make a hundred people very happy.

The pilot rolls his eyes and! says to his co-pilot, "Such arrogant idiots back there. I could throw the three of them out the window and make 56 million people really happy.

How to test intelligent people
How to test intelligent people

While visiting India, George Bush is invited to tea with Abdul Kalam.

He asks Kalam what his leadership philosophy is.
He says that, it is to surround himself with intelligent people.

Bush asks how he knows if they're intelligent.

"I do so by asking them the right questions," says Kalam. "Allow me to demonstrate."

Bush watches as Kalam phones Manmohan Singh and says, "Mr. Prime Minister, please answer this question:
Your mother has a child, and your father has a child, and this child is not your brother or sister. Who is it?"

Manmohan immediately responds, "It's me, Sir !"

"Correct. Thank you and good-bye" says Kalam. He hangs up and says," Did you get that, Mr. Bush?"

Bush nods: "Yes Mr. President. Thanks a lot.

I'll definitely be using that!"

Bush, upon returning to Washington, decides he'd better put Condoleezza Rice to the test.
Bush summons her to the White House and says, "Condoleezza, I wonder if you can answer a question for me."

"Why, of course, sir. What's on your mind?"

Bush poses the question: "Uhh, your mother has a child, and your father has a child, and this child is not your brother or your sister. Who is it?"

Rice was puzzled and finally asks, "Can I think about it and get back to you?" Bush agrees, and Rice leaves.

Rice immediately calls a meeting of senior senators, and they puzzle over the question for several hours,
but nobody can com e up with an answer.. Finally, in desperation, Rice calls Colin Powell and explains the problem.

"Mr. Powell, your mother has a child, and your father has a child, and this child is not your brother or your sister. Who is it?"

Powell answers immediately, "It's me, of course."

Much relieved, Rice rushes back to the White House, finds George Bush, and exclaims,

"I know the answer, sir! I know who it is!
It's our Colin Powell!"

And Bush replies in disgust, "Wrong, it's Manmohan Singh!"






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